so sad.. i feel like i abandoned my poor little blogger, but i swear that's not the case.. i've wanted to blog about sundance, but it seems like such a daunting task so i keep putting it off.. but then i only just keep adding to what i am going to blog about because it's sundance plus what i've done after i've come back (which is nothing really).. but anyways.. you get the picture.

it's been awhile.. so i don't even know where to start. i'm also trying to figure out to do this collapse thing.. like where it says "first day at sundance" and you click on it and it expands the entry to show everything.. but i think since this i blogger i can't really control things like that. so everyone will just have to bear with the super long post. or just avoid it like the plague.

i think my audioblog this is pretty rad. i actually re-recorded it like 3 times because the first time i got cut off (yea shut up.. ha ha ha) and the second time it was stupid and the third time was the final one.. and the movie was starting so i just posted it.

so.. here is sundance in a nutshell.

5 days, 10 movies, 3 parties, and 1 giftbag later i am home from sundance (well, plus one week and one day). it was a lot of fun, and definitely nice to just hang out, not have to worry about work, or waking up early if you didn't want to, or nagging parents, or telling someone what time you're going to be home.

flight and first day - jan 20/21
i got home from work with my clean teeth and finished up last minute packing and what not. my parents drove me to the long beach airport, except we got a little lost. my parents were yelling at each other about which way to go, and after calling multiple people who didn't answer, sergi finally gave me directions of how to get on route to the airport. thanks sergi! after a mini fight with my mom (gotta have one for the road right?) i boarded my plane to salt lake city. you'd think a flight in the middle of the week at 8pm wouldn't be too full right? wrong.. crowwwded. but i guess because it was snow season and sundance.. so whatever. i got to salt lake at 11-ish and then took the half hour shuttle ride to park city and got dropped off at the cabin my sister rented.. it was pretty nice. except i had to walk up this long hill of a driveway in the cold thin air... with my heavy luggage.. haha.. i'm such a wuss. but it was cool. we stayed up kind of late.. i watched my sister and jeff-gu play scrabble until the wee hours of the morning. they were having a scrabble feud inspired by their screening of Word Wars. we were supposed to wake up early and try to get on the stand by list for Super Size Me but didn't quite make it, so after sleeping a little bit more chris, joan and i went to go get tickets for Easy. also that morning chris decided to make an cheese omelette. but as he grabbed the cheese out of the fridge again to add more cheese he carried the bag upside down and i watched the shredded cheese rain onto the kitchen floor. i tell chris and he promptly yells "LIAR!.. this bag isn't resealable" and i fall over laughing. it doesn't sound quite as funny as i type this out.. but i wanted to write it, so when i re-read this i can remember and chuckle to myself. :P

Easy was pretty good. it was lots of nekkid-ness... and the first girl from mighty ducks was in the movie and there for the q&a session afterwards so i got to meet her!! i am a huge dork and went and told her how i was excited to see her in this movie because i love the mighty ducks movie. yes.. i am a big 'ol dork. ate lunch at the way too expensive concession stand. and then caught another screening Brother to Brother at the Library (the same place as the first screening). it was the actual park city library and they had a auditorium which was pretty cool. i think it was the second largest screening venue. after that we headed over to the holiday theaters, which was three small theaters that they were using for sundance (sucks for people who live there.. where do they go to watch regular movies?) i helped pass out lithographs and fake tattoos as giveaways for the second screening of my sister's doc In the Realms of the Unreal during the screening we hung out at this cute little place two stores down called rUinTAH eggs. cute huh? :P

it was a breakfast foody type place that was open until 3am, probably quite the popular hang out. they have rad hot chocolate. we had dinner until it was time to go back for the q&a session and pass stuff out again. after the screening i wanted to go try and catch zach braff's movie Garden State but there was like a million people waiting in line to get on the wait list (on top of people who already had actual tickets) so since there was like 300 people in front of me i opted to just not waste my time. i called up courtney who i had run into earlier in the day to see what she was doing. it was pretty crazy.. i was shopping in the sundance merch booth at gateway where she was volunteering and she came up to me and was like "is your name jean?" we met sophomore year through circle k and just kind of lost touch since then (USD cki fell apart, she went abroad to spain, blah blah blah) but it was rad to see her again. and that night i got to hang out with her, and her friends ruth ann and matt. we had a good amount of fun, we first went to this bar j.b. mulligans (where i lost one of my gloves... boo) and then made the taxi man drive all over town trying to fidn where the gen art/fcuk party was.

it was on very top of this mountain in this huge cabin. pretty crazy. there was free drinks, food and the roots were playing. since ruth ann's friend was working the door she got me and matt wristbands. nice to know friends in high places. we drank and partied and danced we got free chapstick on a rope, fcuk safely condoms (they're different colors too!) and giftbags. :) nice.

second day - jan 22
slept in since we had such a full day the day before. but joan's friend was working in the box office, so we got all kinds of hook ups with tickets. sweet huh? she got us tickets to Napolean Dynamite which i hadn't originally anticipated on seeing, but a lot of people had been saying good things about it, so i was excited to see it. it was showing at Eccles Theater which is the biggest and nicest venue out of all the ones for the sundance screenings (at least in park city). but it's the high school's auditorium.. that must be nice for the students, even if they have to put up with the public coming and invading their school. it was really nice, a huge stage, nice seats and even a balcony. but anyways.. when we got to eccles the wait list line was huge and crazy, thank god we had tickets. there was also a bunch of people standing around tryng to buy tickets because they didn't want to wait in line, or just realized they didn't have a chance.

while my sister was waiting for chris to come back from parking the car she said some guy was like "who wants to buy one ticket?" and some guy jumped out from line and was like "i'll pay $100!!" crazy huh? that's where i audio blogged from, waiting for the movie to start. i saw danny glover pass by (i didn't know he was one of the grand jury judges) and there was this girl sitting a few rows behind me that looked kind of like hilary duff, and it was her sister (who was in the movie)... haha... i found myself thinking.. "man.. i wish norma and maritza were here" hahah. but the movie was super funny and entertaining and i guess it was the premiere screening so i think the full cast was there. it gave me hope for the high school dork in me :) afterwards we shuttled it on over to main street where there was a bunch of shops, another movie venue (the egyptian) and the sundance house, filmmaker's lodge.. etc etc etc. we ate lunch at this pizza place that was pretty yummy and then went to catch A Good Lawyer's Wife a korean movie. we caught dinner at this mexican food place called zona rosa. i had a $10 off coupon from a book i picked up (go me).. but it was still pretty expensive for food that was okay. we hurried back to eccles for D.E.B.S. my sister was really excited for this movie, but once it started... we were all kind of blah. it was alright.. i thought it was going to be kidn of alias-y but it was more like charlie's angels 2 but worse. guys might like it cuz there's models in short skirts and a lesbian action based plot... and i could see them marketing it really well and creating this big hype.. but really.. don't go see it. unless you loved charlie's angels 2... then whatever floats your boat.

we caught the shuttle over to the VW drive in party, which sounded kind of cool but that was also not quite as fun either. especially because my sister and chris aren't big partiers, or at least not with me around :P it was in this huge warehouse/barn thing.. and there was dirt and straw all over the ground and kinda smelled like fertilizer. there was a dance area in the middle, but it was trance/house music and all the lights were on.. not my ideal dancing environment especially since joan and chris didn't want to. i'm not also a big dance by myself type either. there was this hp station where they'd take pictures and print their out on their photo printers so that was pretty cool. and then they also had 9 of their cars in set up facing this giant screen (drive in party... get it?) so we got to sit in this bug convertible .. it was neat. (yea i know nicole... boo volkswagen boo.. but i was just sitting in it :P) too bad i didn't get to sit in the new toureg (vw suv).. that would have been pretty sweet.

third day - jan 23

and so the fun continues. we decided to shuttle it to eccles (instead of dealing with the traffic) and were a little late but still on time to our first screening of the day November it was kind of like a thriller in the sixth sense kind of style. courtney cox-arquette was in it, so that was pretty cool to see her in a different kind of thing. it was good, and i didn't really get it at first, but after the q&a i understood it a little more. i'm not that bright with thinking kind of movies :P but i'm glad i got to see it. they won the cinematography award, and my sister had really liked their work, and it was all shot on DVcam so that was pretty impressive.

chris went off to go meet with his friends, so joan and i didn't really have plans, we wanted to catch The Best Theif in the World because we were going to get free tickets, but we didn't think we could get to it in time, so we ended up watching Below the Belt which neither joan or myself thought was very good, but joan's friends really loved.. hmm.. different strokes for different folks right? it was a play adapted into a movie, so it was really talky and there was lots of cg effects. afterwards i treated my sissy-poo to the "Grub Steak House" which is where they had this great steak dinner when my sister came to sundance with BLT so she was excited to go again and was craving really good steak. i had a coupon for a free dessert (good 'ol coupon book) but it wasn't valid during sundance, and my sister just HAD to point it out to the waiter... dang it. but since my sister had let me crash in her cabin and pretty much paid for all our other meals i took care of this one. :) how nice of me huh? :P we tried to catch Super Size Me but we had thought that one of joan's friends' friends could walk us in because they had worked on it, but her friend flaked, so there went the friends' friend. joan's friend was a publicist for the movie and he could get us one ticket, but that wasn't really enough either.. boo. the other sucky part was that this guy had tickets to sell and walked right past me, and i had wanted to say something to him, but i didn't want to harass him, and then he gave the tickets to another girl boo. so joan and i went home and just chilled... but there was nothing on tv, and not much else to do, so we decided to go to walmart. fun huh? hahhaa. nicole and beth's favorite pasttime. so spent some time at wal mart, then albertson's and then back home and it was finally time for the midnight screening of In the Realms of the Unreal. i got courtney and ruth ann tickets and we all watched it, well.. kinda court and ruth ann fell asleep.. oops. hey it was a midnight screening and they had worked all day. it was good, kind of sad because they guy (henry darger) had a sad life story, but fascinating as well :P afterwards matt dragged courtney and ruth ann to rUinTAH, so i went to chit chat for a bit and joan and chris came along (since they were my ride home). we sat, chatted and drank hot chocolate.. yum :) it was fun, we were all kind of delirious.. it was a good time.

day 4 & 5 - jan 24/25
it was my last day at sundance (saaad) so i had to make the most of it right? i got up to meet courtney and ruth ann and their roommate robin to try and catch Word Wars but yet again we underestimate the craziness of people and there's like 100 ppl or so in front of us and we won't get in. boo. so we go to this place called Renee's which is a vegetarian place, but there's lots of fake meat stuff like b.l.a.t.'s and i had chicken taquitos and courtney had an omelette. my mom would have loved that place, if she ever goes to park city, we'll go there :) she hates going to "american food" places because they only have pasta or salad and she just doesn't like those limitations. but anyhoo... it was alright.. they had this really really good dessert (i love my desserts) of a fudge brownie with peanut butter mousse and fresh whipped cream.. it was amazing. we also got key lime pie (i'm a piggy.. i know) but it wasn't as great. it was very tarty... but nothing beats chocolate :P we walked around and went to the sundance house where we sat in the VW massage chairs (oohh) and checked email. i also saw all these posters of picture they took of actors/directors/musicians at sundance. snapped pix of jason mraz when he played at the cafe there (i missed it .. boo) but he played sunday before i even got there.. sucky. and snapped jessica's pix (the director of my sis' doc) and a pix of these muppets that they had in the shorts at the beginning of each movie. they'd say like "sundance myth #9: it's never too early" and then show the muppets freezing in the snow late at night waiting to get tickets to a showing the next day. they had really funny ones.. like my sister said "everything's funnier with muppets."

i met chris and joan at eccles and i waited in line to get a ticket for Zatoichi, which wasn't too hard. it was a japanese kung fu movie, pretty violent (thanks for telling me in advance joan) and i kept having to move my head side to side so i could read the caption cuz there was a pretty big dude in front of me. and i kept thinking.. man.. i wish i was sakura so i could just understand japanese and wouldn't have to keep moving around to understand what's goin' on. afterwards we got on the shuttle to the awards show, and while waiting for joan's friends to show up my sister wanted to take pictures with her motion camera. it had four lenses and takes pictures 2 split seconds apart, so you click it and it goes *click click click click* and catches your motion. so my sister told me to go run in the snow ... so of course, i did it. except the snow bank was pretty high, so i climbed to edge of the snow and 1-2-3 i stepped out to start my run. i thought maybe if i ran fast enough i wouldn't fall through and i could actually run. uh no. i stepped on the snow and my leg fell in and i fell in the snow. i hear my sister laughing and saying how she got a great shot, probably of my ass as i fell in the snow. fun huh? i tried to get the snow off me before it made my clothes wet and tore open my pack of hot hands (these all natural herb packs that emit heat.. like an ice pack, but opposite). they're like the best cold weather invention ever, they get pretty hot too. you put them in your pocket and you are happy and toasty :) my sister's publicist friend knew i had them and stuck his hands in my pockets and i was like whoa.. but i think he was gay so it was a friendly invasion. i gave him one of my hot hands and so hopefully i can call in a favor next time :P jk.

anyways, i sat in the anterior room of the awards ceremony, which was just this big room where they set up chairs and a giant screen of what was going on inside (where the important people were :P) i sat by myself when everyone else inside, and i was a little buzzed from my wine and beer and no dinner. weird huh? anyways.. on the way to the bathroom i walked by the awards ceremony room and i swear to god it looked just like international convention, rows of chairs, giant screens, podium. fun huh? so i guess i wasn't missing out on too much, except the people. my sister sat behind zach braff and zooey deschanel and jake gyllenhall hosted the awards show. yea.. that's definitely different from icon. but anyways... it was kind of sad that my sister's doc didn't win anything, but there were only a few awards and so many entries. they started describing the grand jury doc winner about the struggle of an artist, and i got really excited because i thought it might be my sister's, but it wasn't. such a let down, it was just like reliving that scrapbook blasphemy :P afterwards my sister had tickets to one last movie at 9pm, but we didn't get out until 8:30pm and we were starving. there was a party going on but my sister and chris wanted to watch the movie. but there was free food, so we tried to catch both. it was a "Rock Around the Block" party that Sundance was hosting, as the last hurrah. it was pretty fun though. it was kind of like grad night, and they took this street, set up fun lights and screens on the outside and had like 9 or so businesses as the "party places" where they had food, drinks, activities. you got a wristband and could hop from place to place. we rushed to the least crowded one, a mexican food place, la casita. it was real yummy and thankfully we got there before it was super crowded and got a plate and a table. we scarfed our food as fast as possible so we could leave for the movie. as we were leaving they had stopped letting people in, so with the taquitos in my pocket (ghetto.. i know, but i didn't want to waste them and throw them away) we ran up the hill to the egyptian. well tried to at least, with a full stomach, carrying lots of junk (i hadn't gone back to the cabin that day) and the thin air, running up hills was not in my best interest. it also started snowing on our walk up there, and that was super exciting. i was so glad it was snowing, i don't really remember being in real snow, so i was glad to hear that a snow storm was coming in (i'm a weirdo.. i know). we got to the theater and thankfully they let us in even though we were late because chris ran ahead and let them know we were still coming. we watched Last Life in the Universe which was another japanese movie. it wasn't too bad although i didn't quite get it, i think because we missed the beginning. we got outside and it was still snowing!! yay!! i took lots of pictures and videos, and played. and funny enough.. it was "snowing on main street!!!" but this time for real. funny coincidence huh? so cute. afterwards chris headed back home and joan and i went back to the parties (at my request). i just wanted to go see the other places and soak up as much fun before it was time to leave.

we went into this bar where they had chocolate fondue and fruit earlier in the night, so i saw the empty fruit plates and solidified chocolate.. boo... i waited a long long time for drinks cuz there were so many people, but i also didn't want to drink that much anyways because i had to pack and catch my shuttle at 4am for my 6:30am flight (painful!). we went outside and it had started snowing a lot harder, and i was elated. i took pictures, ran around in the snow, my sister started networking yet again, so i just played :) finally i ran into the salon, where i was hoping to get some free beauty products or maybe a manicure or something, but they had the hp thing again where they'd print you pictures, so joan and i did that again.

we left there and it was snowing real hard so we walked through the snow, took some pictures along the way next to sundance signs and finally got to the shuttle station. got back to the parking lot where we parked the car. we had to wipe the snow off the car though.. crazy!!! i had this little scraper that i had found in the car, and ended up wiping a lot of snow on to myself (stupid) but it was still fun. i was lovin' it. joan drove back and she said it was a little hard and scary driving in the snow. finally we got back home driving kind of slow on the unpaved road up to the house and joan tried to drive up the steep long driveway to the cabin. but the tires would melt the snow to ice and the car would slide to the side and i had visions of crashing into the rocks. it was pretty freaky. so my sister tried to park on the side of the street and it was kind of hard to turn around and fyi my sister is really really REALLY bad at parallel parking or even parking at curbs.. well especially in the snow. she was scared that if she parked too close that maybe it would get stuck or something.. so she didn't want to park too close, but she was parking real far away, like 2 feet, so i had to park the car. it was definitely pretty hard to drive in the snow, especially on hills. and i started to smell this slight burning smell, so i freaked. but we finally parked and i walked up to the house, and right before we went in, my sister was like "you could make your snow angel here" (the driveway in front of the garage). i had been talking all week about how i kinda really wanted to make a snow angel, and so now here was my chance. so i stripped off my jacket and lied down in the snow and made my snow angel. it was WAY fun and kind of cold. if my mom finds out she'll probably hurt me, but hey.. i ran inside and took off the wet clothes and took a hot shower, so no harm no foul right?

i made a snow angel :) i spent the next few hours sorting through all the crap i had picked up free magazines, free gift stuff, random movie postcards, movie giveaways and souvenirs, indie wires and sundance bulletins and packed. i finished with enough time to make myself some breakfast, clean up stuff in the kitchen, finish my ice cream, watch some fuzzy full house with no sound and take a ten minute nap. i saw the shuttle guy outside and they called me cuz i guess the guy had walked up the driveway and he didn't want to ring the doorbell (because it was 4am and the house was dark) so i told them that i'd be right down and i had to walk down the driveway and they said to be careful and take my time. so as i was walking down the driveway i see the shuttle guy leave and i'm like "what the heck!!!" but then i see him turn around down the street (as i'm frantically trying to call the shuttle company) and he passes the me and tells me he'll be right back cuz he has to turn around again. why were you leaving huh? i was the first stop of 5 (crazy flight schedules) and driving to the airport was a bit scary. he was going pretty fast, but i guess he was used to it. there were these girls on the corner who flagged us down and asked if they could get a ride, but the shuttle guy said that he was in a hurry, but immediately after that another shuttle drove up to get them. there was a jackknifed big rig taking up 3 of the 4 lanes of the freeway, but before we were close enough to know that i was scared that we would be stuck there for hours. btw- how do you know what lanes are what when snow is covering the freeway? that's kind of a scary thought. we were also behind a few snow plows that were kind of big and scary, but slow, so our shuttle guy sped past them. i fell asleep after that until we got to the airport and then checked in, and got on the plane. there was snow covering the plane and i figured it'd just fall off once we were going fast enough, but i guess they had to spray this "de-icing" goo on the plane to get it all off first. after that i fell asleep, woke up to drink some apple juice and water and slept some more. it was a good time. i snapped a few pictures of the clouds and the wonderful sun as we arrived back in long beach.

yay california, i couldn't wait to put on my reefs again. my daddy picked me up and drove me home and i went straight to bed. i slept all day until beth called to wake me up for the game. good thing she did or i probably would have slept right through it. so that was sundance. it was tons of fun, i'm glad that i ran into courtney because it made my sundance experience that much better. i'm glad i got to hang out with my sister again, because we hardly get to now that she moved out. and chris was great and tons of fun. thanks utah!

sundance pictures here... watch out there are 300+

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i went to the dentist today.. and i was sitting there thinking... i wonder if my hygienist gets excited when sees someone's mouthful of plaque and thinks "ooh.. which one am i gonna attack first" and then after she's done with all the scraping and polishing.. does she check over her handiwork with that little mirror on the stick and say "damn i'm good."

i almost feel like i'm in school again. i am surviving on three hours of sleep. but it's okay.. it hasn't quite caught up to me yet... maybe i'll just take another nap in my car again when it does. :P

but i'm still pretty excited i stayed up til 3am packing and hoping my clothes were warm enough for utah. my mom's like "you only have summer clothes" well duh. but lots of layers... which i have learned from the gap. :) but i think it'll be okay. hopefully.. i have lots of gloves and two jackets. i don't quite have the appropriate shoes, but i'm hoping my sneakers and the boots nicole gave me don't fail me. my mom says i'll trip and fall, i hope not. just don't run around in the snow. plus i read that they have directv for each seat on jetblue.. hehhe... nice.

i got a new phone.. well new/old.. but it seems pretty new. after waiting for like 40 minutes i told the guy i had already been there like 3 times.. and he was pretty nice. which is surprising... when i've gone there in the past some of their employees were pretty rude. but i got the same phone, but a newer model, it's got a blue face instead of grey and is shinier.. ooohh.. and it feels really new. i am excited. it's purtty.. so here's to hoping i don't drop/lose/break my phone and it doesn't suck.

a few exciting news in tv... new one tree hill (yay!) sakura is taping real world san diego and newlyweds for me. (oh yea!) and i just read that they're coming out with an average joe three!! hehehe.. they're pulling a bachelor and bringing back adam from average joe 1 (the nice millionaire who got dumped for the pretty boy... not the fairy tale ending everyone was hoping for) and he's going to be choosing (i guess he broke up with his gf). i wonder if they're going to give him "average" girls? or hot girls... hmm.. well.. there's an open call casting this weekend in LA. if you want to know where.. let me know!

so i haven't returned anything yet... well.. not true. i returned these camera accessories from best buy.. but not anything i bought on friday. but they were very expensive camera accessories, so i felt a little better. a part of it got put on my credit card, and then i got a $10 store credit (from a gift exchange gift i returned) and as i was walking through the store i saw IT. the MIGHTY DUCKS TRILOGY BOX SET. it's glorious. i was SO excited.. i didn't even know it existed until a few weeks ago, i had always just thought... it would be smart of them to make a box set. and then i saw it online and freaked. i had never seen it in stores until that night. with my store credit the total came out to be $15.15 - for 3 excellent dvd's. i am a great shopper.

saturday i vegged at home. watched a week's worth of tv shows that i had taped.. so i basically sat on the couch all day. it was faboo. sunday a confused jill, vivian and i drove up to the dark softball field to find out our game was cancelled because they couldn't turn the lights on. hmm.. glad someone called us. a few minutes later beth drove up, and called ryan, then a pissed off ryan drove up. so i chatted with the guy from the other team, and his teammate on the phone who wouldn't believe him, and they told me that they were planning to let us win. (because they are the large large team that beat us even when they weren't trying). that's cool.. although i'd like us to win on our own merit sometime. eventually we all wound up at the cheesecake factory (not the guy from the other team :P) and had a yummy dinner while staring at the hot waiter, and the cute guy at the next table (ryan wasn't staring). yea.. girls are stupid sometimes. afterwards we went to ryan's to watch sex in the city... yay ryan for having hbo and tivo! it was really funny this week. it's so sad that there's only 5 episodes left. boo.

i also finished setting up the dvd player and vcr (a new one) in my room. that's pretty exciting... now if i just get a mini fridge i won't ever have to leave my room on the weekends. just kidding... i'll need to leave to go to the bathroom :P

i also figured out that my cell phone is broken... yes AGAIN. i can't hear out of it unless i have the headset plugged in. it's pretty crappy. the frequency of my cell phone troubles are just like nicole's car troubles. i've had to switch my phone two or three times already. BOOOOOO! and each time they give me a refurbished phone. i understand i can't get a new phone each time.. but yah know... three times is a little excessive. i feel like i keep getting phones that don't work. and so i asked the verizon wireless guy if it was the phone model and he says "no unfortunately it's just your bad luck" uh.. thanks? so i gotta get a new/old phone before i leave on tuesday, so i'm going to change it today, but i'm still very wary. i wish they could do something.. but they won't.. freaking verizon wireless. you suck! don't get the LG VX4400. boo on this phone.

i need to stop spending money... if you're around me and i'm buying something.. tell me no.

i have the ultimate buyer's remorse. beth and i were supposed to just go the mall, grab dinner and go work out - or maybe hang out with nicole. instead of the work out we ended up shopping instead. i was just supposed to pick up my schedule and paycheck, but i ended up getting 3 pairs of underwear, a necklace, and lots of body sprays, lotions and body washes. bad bad bad. probably like $95 or so. that plastic just jumps out of my wallet i'm telling you. i'm going to have to do a lot of returning.. and i always feel so bad. like i was just teasing them with my business. i am an indian giver shopper.

like yesterday, after a defunct softball practice we were going to go work out, but instead we went to chili's where we ate all this food, then jill, beth and i went to the gym (although i probably only worked off half of what i ate for dinner), where we got interrogated and questioned on stuff like whether or not we were related, and how many kids we had, by the scary, weird, kinda of creepy, commission hungry bally's guy. he freaked beth out.. but we had a pretty good time working out. it's definitely more fun to go with friends. :)

ugh... i hate tough decisions. why can't life just be simple.. and your life laid out for you. it may suck but at least you'd know what to do.

and how is it that parents can make you seem like the epitome of failure. with a feel little words they can make you feel worse than you already did. you are the disspointment, you are the scar in their perfect skin, you are the dirt in their perfect white house. and they don't even say it those words, just words that don't seem threatening, but cut you deep.

does this happen to everyone?

or is it just me.

happy anniversary to my parents (yesterday). aww... <3

my dad wanted to take everyone out to dinner, so my mom decided that she wanted to go the mall food court for dinner. haaha. we had chicken tostadas and mongolian noodles and dairy queen. yum. we also went shopping and i got two new purses and some shoes.. whoo hoo! (wait.. i thought i was supposed to be giving my mom gifts.. not the other way around). oh well.

i dug the extra vcr my mom bought out of the back room, and after much debate my mom finally sold it to me for $55. i guess that's alright. i finally plugged it in through various connectors, only to find out that the heads were dirty and then i noticed that the packinging looked "not so new" so after all that hard work i have to go return it for a new one. should have just bought a new one in the first place. grr.

my sister is currently MIA. i have no idea where she is, her cell phone is off, and she hasn't been to work. either something's wrong or she's doing a lot of playing.

one last thing: i was reading up about that new movie Miracle. at first i was like. wow this kind of seem like an adult's mighty ducks. complete with hot boys of the appropriate age. it's almost like the mighty ducks grew up and made a movie. after more reading it's based on a true story, but still looks pretty interesting. it gives me warms tinglies watching the commercials. hahah. i'm such a loser.

a big fat happy birthday!! goes to kimmy :) the gibbler. (no it's not really the chick from full house). kimmy is an old fart hitting 23, but still hot as hell. and single now, snatch her up while you can boys!

not much to blog about lately.. haven't been doing anything interest (shut up.. i know what you're thinking.. "jean you never do anything interesting). be quiet. i'm fun.. i swear. anyhoo... just playing softball... whoa man.. it wasn't quite as bad as last time with the mercy rule going into effect, but they did hit the 10 run cap in the first inning. boo. we HAVE TO win a game... i'll feel dumb if we don't. i hope we win against that brooklyn pizza team because according to beth they were talking lots of smack about us. retards.

thursday night i had dinner with my sister and watch tv on her lovely (soon to be mine... ) tivo. i love that thing.. hahah. friends was good.. i laughed hard when they mentioned the gap on it. :)

joey:(sarcastically to ross) nice shirt
ross: dude, you're wearing the same shirt
joey: stupid gap on every corner!

my sister also laughed and pointed at me. the weekend was all ho hum.. i was in a by myself mood, so saturday my parents went out and i just spent the day/night by myself, and doing a few errands and three loads of laundry. i figured there's not many opportunities where i just have the peace and quiet of the empty house to myself.. so i decided to take advantage of it. sunday i went to souplantation and costco with my parents. i almost conned my mom into getting a dish network system.. but she told me that i should do a little bit more research first. does anyone know which is better? dish network, directv, or just time warner cable? after the game on sunday, beth, jill and i mooched off ryan's hbo and ate dinner and watched sex in the city and the tail end of simpsons. unfortunately my contacts were bothering me and gave me a huge headache so i couldn't really enjoy anything properly... but it was still good. thanks ryan!

big news: (of the excitement that is my life)
*pete holiday is coming to la... finally. haha.. it's been mentioned before, but he finally actually set dates and bought a ticket. haha.. he should have bought it earlier, like i told him, to save money.. but he thinks i'm retarded because i'm a girl and a democrat. (jk).

*i'm going to SUNDANCE! whoo hoo. i am waay excited. it'll be nice to get out of here for awhile. my sister is going, so she had mentioned something about i could stay with her. i feel like maybe it's one of those things you say to be nice, because you don't think it'll happen, but when the other person is serious you instantly regret it. jk. maybe. but too bad. this documentary that my sister worked on "In the Realms of the Unreal" is in Sundance, so she's going, and I decided to seize the opportunity and go too. the only sad part is that a lot of the tickets to the screenings are sold out already, so i'm going to do a lot of waiting and hoping, and jason mraz is playing at this day cafe thing this sunday, but i don't get there until wednesday. but it is still rad .. I'm going to be braving the freezing cold of Utah and watching some movies, maybe meeting some movie stars and going to some parties.. hehe... and maybe I'll go snowboarding or something. Park City is supposed to be AWESOME. i am excited. who wants a postcard?

careful if you're going to be around the area kiddies. last night there was a shootout where they killed this guy who had car jacked this lady and already had one shootout in the morning in redondo beach. scary huh? the shootout happened at 190th and prarie which is not far from my house at all, and funny enough i had just left my house right before the shootout happened, so if i had taken prarie instead of crenshaw i would have been an unlucky duck.

we had softball practice at columbia park later that night, which is right on the corner where it happened, and there was tons of traffic from all the cars being re-routed, and we could see the flashing lights and all. we moved practice up to 6pm, but good thing it was at wilson park first. 1.5 hours later (trying to find a park to practice at where the lights were still on) we ended up at columbia. good twists of fate huh?

the guy who died had a partner, who is still on the loose, so i saw a police man patrolling our street this morning. it's a little scary, i'm gonna try to not be outside much, and don't open the door for strangers! plus lock your doors while you drive!

not much to write about since i haven't been doing much in the past few days. i want to be one of those bloggers who post interesting stories, instead of just the doldrums of my day, but i guess it's not meant to be... not just yet. that'll be something i'll work up to.

but there is a guy who is GREAT at writing.. pete showed me to him to fill the void that is my "job" (i use that term loosely), he's going to be my new obsession. he's very funny and tells great story, and is smart and sarcastic. hmm.. wonder why pete was reading him :P

I've never really been a fan of fish

The Walmart Story

these both ROCK. they've got dolphins, vomit, crappy jobs, revenge and porn. yum.

my mom is being an uber jerk currently. she's like having hot flashes or something because she's just pissed off about everything. it makes it rather unpleasant in my house and makes me not like her so much right now. don't get me wrong, i'm not one of those unappreciative jerks that hates their parents (although it may feel/seem that way sometime) but there's just so much conflict and drama between me and my mother, we have this unique ability to not be able to talk about anything, just fight. i was sleeping the other day and my mom came and started yelling about all these things. one of which was how i don't got to sleep early enough?! so how does it make sense that you woke me up to tell me these things?! thanks. plus the fact that she's pretty overbearing and feels like she needs to control every aspect of my life, like if i'm doing something she doesn't like, she'll just try to remove it from me. like when i was little she'd hide the video games so i wouldn't play them all the time. that was cool when i was in middle school, but god dang.. after living on my own for 4 years, this does not feel good. last night i was on the phone with nicole and my mom got pissed and told me to hang up and give her the phone downstairs. WHAT?! exactly. she reminded me of it again this morning.. it's not going to happen. sorry. so anyways... maybe this is what i need to give my job hunt a swift kick in the ass. my mom teeters on overbearing to cool, and this is just the VERY low end of the slump.. it is not making me happy at all.

boo.

happy birthday jill!!

hAppy new year friends! the softball ump said "although nothing really seems new from last year" and i thought that was an insult about our team, but he said it was just the fact that nothing really changes even if it's a new year, norma said the same thing on her blog, which may be true... but it can also be what you make of it. so i don't know.

anyhoo.. it's been a pretty fun coupla' days. i had work here and there, nothing to big, spending lots of time on the internet :) although it has it's drawbacks.. i actually got pretty bored of being online, but i found a splendid new game.. hexic.. it occupied me all day on friday and i didn't get bored once, it was nice. :)

i spent new year's eve waiting in line with carol and sakura. fun huh? plus the bouncer let in the people right before us a little bit before midnight, so there was that little glimpse of hope we'd get in, and us staring at the crowd inside celebrating. but seeing as how it was the hermosa pier there were tons of people milling around and tons of people to countdown and celebrate with, so it wasn't too un-new-year's-ish. we counted down, people cheered, i'm sure the band at the end of the pier played some fun song (i couldn't hear them), carol, sakura and i hugged, took pictures, and then a few minutes later paid $30 to get in to the lighthouse cafe where we were meeting up with carrie, and her friends, amanda flaute and jen. after the three of us got inside we tried to get tipsy as fast as possible, taking shots of 151, lemon drops, and tequila.. but it didn't really give us that special buzz.. man.. we need to stop drinking. all though i did have that fun feeling like my insides were burning after the 151... nice huh?

friday was a full 16 hours of work, i met up with my family at this italian restaurant in mb.. Lido. it was really good. pretty froofy.. but good. and then afterwards we went to gable house for rock 'n' bowl. me and shirley played DDR while we were waiting for the lanes to open. she's real good, and of course i looked like a fool. but i'm a lot better than when i tried to play that one time in buffalo with ryan. thanks to michele's disney DDR! :) right before we were about to play, this fight between these hs girls erupted. the girl who was playing DDR at the time ran over to help her friends and proceed to pull hair, punch, kick and beat the crap out of this other girl. it was really scary, i was kind of freaked out. shirley and i kept inching backwards as the tumbling crowd neared us. i've never seen a fight before, and definitely not like that. all the guys were standing around jeering - not even stopping it.. what the heck?! anyways.. i was pretty freaked out, and then i remembered in middle school when my best friend got the crap kicked out of her because she accidently tripped this girl wearing white jean during PE while they were playing soccer. so they beat her up because she got grass stains on her white jeans. honestly.. what some people think.. and my mother thinks that i'm the devil child.

after waiting and flashbacks to my misguided youth, we went to go rock 'n bowl from midnight to 3am. it was pretty fun, even though i sucked awfully bad. bowling is just not my game. i had pictures of my "stellar" score, but they're on my sister's camera, you're just going to have to wait to see the glory. :) it was real fun though. saturday i just chilled, watched felicity (always a fave) and then went with sakura to south gate to eat with hailes (his treat.. haha) at el ranchito. it was pretty good, i'm always down for some good mexican rice. yum. afterwards we caught the second half of the ucsd men's basketball game vs. csudh. it was a really close game, but we won.. so that's good. the guys are 3-1 in conference, so maybe this year will be good for them :) when i got there cameron wasn't playing, and then he got put in, but he fouled out after a few minutes (which was probably why he wasn't in the game). it was shoddy though, he hit a guys hand while he was going up for a shot. sometimes you just can't avoid that shit. boo. so i didn't get to see him play much, but it was still fun. there was a good amount of ucsd fans, lots of screaming and yelling, and i chatted a bit with cameron after the game. i do miss school a lot sometimes. but yay.. go tritons :)

then i went to ryan's apt to go play poker. well basically i went to hang out with them and donated $10 to mike, paul, ryan and shyam. it's okay, it was my first time. it's pretty fun, me and beth wanted to play just for fun, but guys are all about the money and taking it from helpless people. haha. jk. hopefully i can get better eventually and i'll take their money. haha.. i can dream can't i?

sunday i went to the wedding expo for joan with the family. it was interesting. saw this gown/tux show, tried lots of food samples and cake samples, got some free shizz, and just milled around. it was pretty interesting, although my sister doesn't have a ton of stuff set yet, so it was just browsing. people kept asking me if had set a date yet... ahha do i look like i'm getting married? i guess you never can tell. one day a group of us will just have to go somewhere and pretend. hahah. especially because it's not going to happen for awhile... but maybe i'll just do it britney style. hell yeah.

i drove back for our the waffles first game of the new year. it was the worst ever, even though it started out as the best. i think mike jinxed us by stating this was our record high... although true, the softball karma-ness didn't want us to get too cocky or hopeful, so the next inning the team hit the 10-run/inning cap and then in the next few innings the mercy rule was invoked because of the 20 run difference. sad sad sad. although i did get on base both my times at bat, which is exciting. we hit a lot better, but did awful fielding, or they just hit real well. hopefully we'll do a lot better in the next games, comeback baby! we'll be just like the bad news bears.

afterwards grabbed a quick bit to eat at home and then off to disneyland.. yay!! i just had to see the holiday magic before it was done for the year. nicole, the snow/firework nazi, yelled orders where to stand, what to do, almost didn't let me get ice cream (which i didn't because the line was too long). but it was worth it. we met up with jimmy and sakura (after lots of phone tag), watched the fireworks (yay) and then in snowed on main street!!! it was so fun, and everyone just stood there in awe. there was a little girl trying to catch the snow in the lunch box, it was SO darling. sakura and jimmy went home and nicole and i went over to the haunted holiday mansion to see the change they did for the nightmare before christmas theme. it was definitely less scary and creepy, but i wouldn't call it cute. then we caught fantasmic (with armando, who we ran into) in the best seats ever (and we only had to wait 3 minutes!) i guess everone went home already. it was real good, except i really don't like how the characters don't cruise by on the mark twain boat anymore. boo.. it definitely seems less fantasmical. then i made nicole go on splash mountain.. i was rad... we were the last ones. it was just fun to go on it and hear nicole cry, she's such a riot. i am not insane... we didn't even get wet. and plus i tried to sit in front of nicole, but she changed seats and sat in front of me. what a weirdo, i think she was just asking for it. just so she's have something to blame on me. SO not my fault. i'm not insane.

grabbed a bite to eat at denny's with nicole and armando. i wanted chowder in a bowl and disneyland, but nicole was a fantasmic nazi and after it was over, all the places were closed. i did get to talk to a cute boy in the parking lot when i asked him for directions. i think denny's is where all the cute disneyland workers go to eat after they get off work. hmm.. i wonder where i'll be (jk). came home late (1am) to an angry mother... gawrsh.. i need to get a real job and move out. new year, that's my plan. i hope.. *sigh*

pete thurston rules! he is rockstar frequenting on 91x.

check out his big fish review.

and his funny funny christmas song.

pete thurston is my hero.

a pete joke:
vivian: ewan mcgregor is so hot
pete: so me and a guy name mcgregor?

hahahah.. well, i thought it was funny. maybe ya just had to be there.

i got the bright idea to look in my old old cell phone for some of my old numbers and ta-da!!! there they were. so if i had your number in my cell pre-july, then whoo hoo, i have found it again. (i feel a little stupid to all the people i sent christmas cards to asking for their number because i just told them i lost it. i'm gonna call them, and they're going to be like.. uhh.. i thought you lost my number, i thought i got rid of you for good.) but i spent a good 10-20 minutes entering numbers into my phone again, it felt great.

i feel semi-complete now.

i am SO bored right now. i'm at work and there's barely anything to do because most of Nissan is off, so there's not much computer fixin to be done, thus not much for me to do. boo. although when i have lots of work to do, i hate it because i'd rather be doing nothing at all, so i won't win either way.

i forgot to say also that i cut my hair. not real big news, i only cut off three inches or so, a lot of people didn't even notice or just didn't care, so not that anyone who reads this didn't alredy know/or cares, but i just wanted to write it for myself so that when i come back and read these i can be like.. aww.. i remember when i cut my hair that one christmas.

i also bought myself another scarf last night. yay... it's got rainbowed circles on it. it's way cute. and it was way on sale, plus my discount, so that makes me real happy. it's a nice scarf too, i already got complimented on it today :) except that everyone thinks i'm sick because i'm all wrapped up in my scarf... it's just cute people.

tomorrow it's new year's eve and i don't really have plans. i can't decide whether i want to be a homebody or go out. i don't want to hassle with crowds, but i also don't want to be lame. hmm.. conflicted.

*disclaimer: whineyness ahead.. self-wallowing pity - read at your own discretion*

also.. feeling real lame because my BA is getting me nowhere and i almost wonder why i even went to college. because i'm still working a temp job and at the gap and i could have done that in high school. i got a little excited about this assistant editor position that a friend referred me for, but they already filled it, plus he asked if i could do all these things that i couldn't.. so basically i'm unqualifed for anything. unlike most people i'm not really great at one (or more) things, i'm just mediocre at a lot of things. which doesn't really get me anywhere because although "fast learner" and "versatile" may sound like good traits, i've come to find that you need to have experience to get a job, but i can't get experience without a job, so pretty much i'm s.o.l. and it's stupid because i'm sure i'm not trying as hard as those other people who have jobs tried.. and maybe that's my other problem. that i half-ass everything. like in school when i would procrastinate like no other, and just skate through class and usually get B's... i always thought.. hey with a little bit of effort i bet i could get an A.. but i never did. it's easy to say that you're going to do better and not be such a lame-o slacker, but i have no drive or motivation anymore. it's almost like i'm quitting smoking and i keep telling myself.. tomorrow i'm gonna quit. tomorrow i'm going to not be a slacker. and then the day after will become the new tomorrow because tomorrow will be today. it's a sadistic cycle. i always thought i was going to have such a promising life... but i'll probably just end up one of those 50 year olds that works at ralphs. NOT that there is much wrong with that, it's just not what i (or probably my parents) pictured for myself. or maybe i'll eventually become a manager at the gap. does anyone aspire to do that? maybe i should just go to taiwan and teach english, or get some crappy ass job that i'm gonna hate, because that's life right? you do what you have to do, not what you want to. that sucks.

i really am too tired to blog, but i feel like i should do it now, rather than put it off and do a marathon post to be haranged about... on top of my unfunny, vulgar, alcoholic, mean-drunkeness tendencies everyone already says i have. what do they know?

well i can't believe christmas and the weekend are over already. it almost feels like it's time to go back to normal life, but then i feel like i didn't to much anyways.. like there is no hoopla to begin with, so what do i go back to? anyways... friday i got off my temp job early (yay my boss!) and rested at home, ran errands and then went to do a night shift at the gap. got off a little early from that and stopped by benji's surprise housewarming party to drop off his gift, and then off to pick up beth and sakura for the concepcion after christmas extravanganza. we entered the house to find a large group and a band rockin out in the living room, so after staring back at the people giving us funny looks like we snuck into some private concert, so went around back to find a very "happy" nicole :) we ate lots of good food, drank a bit, chit chatted, and i am the speed toe champion - the BEST new game :) i beat out all the boys that were "with the band" the girls stayed behind, played tetris, watched dane cook, sex in the city and slept. i got to sleep on the wonder that is nicole's bed (are you listening boys?). the next morning we drove back home (after freaking beth made me turn around to get her beloved pillow) and i came home, ate lunch and went back to bed. only to awake to sakura calling me telling me she's going to be at my house in 45 minutes for jill's birthday party. ate dinner and got ready and off we go. (eat, drink, sleep, eat, sleep, eat... recognize a pattern?)

we went to the standard, a very swanky and expensive hotel with a roof-top bar. apparently it's the hotel where the sex in the city girls stay when they frequent los angeles. it was a $20 cover, followed by $90 on drinks, ice cream and american spirits + tip (not all for me), and fun card games and snacks in the room. the highlights of the rooftop bar was, of course, the ambiance and location, the pool, the waterbed domes, the lounge areas, the fun dancing guy who got me, jill and sakura to dance in order to ask us "who our gay friend was" (jimmy.. haha), and the company (aww...). the rooms itself were pretty cool, i'd say the "porn shower" was the best though. it was like most hotel rooms, except the wall between the shower and the rest of the room was made of glass. sexy. that must be quite a show. at least the curtain wasn't see through so people could at least pee in private. here are some pictures i stole... :) they're really cool though.

*images taken by beth fujiura*

sakura drove me, sukhyung and jimmy home (thanks sakura!) so i could get back to work at the gap. good times. at least it wasn't at 6am today. watched tv tonight... do you know i had a dream the other day about using the tivo my sister promised me? the sole purpose of that dream was to relish in how great it was to have and use tivo. my mother thinks i'm crazy.

my cousin's baby!!! so darling.

merry christmas
merry christmas
merry christmas and happy holidays

*nsync is so wise.

christmas is fun. although our family didn't put up a tree again this year, i think this is one of the first really good christmas' we've had in awhile. this year, i didn't feel as helpless getting christmas presents because i have the money to back up my credit card charging. i finished most of my present shopping already, but picked up a few more last minute gifts because my sister said she got me mulitple gifts, and i felt bad because i had only gotten her one. so i went to go get jeff-gu another gift, and my sister two more gifts and ended up finding something else for my dad too. but it was fun.. i came home to wrap more presents and then clean a little bit for christmas eve dinner.

i left work early (shh.. don't tell my boss) to go get those gifts, but it's okay.. cuz my computer was freaking out and there wasn't much to do anyways. i was SO tired already because i didn't get out of the gap until midnight the day before and stayed up late to wrap presents.

my dad: look! i bought christmas presents, yours is the biggest one!!
me: *covers eyes* i don't want to see it!!! put it away!!!
my dad: but you need to wrap it!
me: i'm not gonna wrap my own present!!
my dad: oh okay.

silly daddy. my sister came home early to wrap her presents then we headed to the mall to do more last minute shopping, and early returns :) and to the wherehouse to rent movies cuz i needed to use up my gift card. legally blonde 2 sucks, freaky friday is pretty good, and i'm waiting for my sister to come back so we can watch how to deal. it was super fun, we ate hot pot for dinner and watched movies and then opened presents.... it was a really fun time :) hope everyone has a great christmas as well.

go check out pete thurston :) he did an interview with 91x (like kroq in san diego.. but not as good) and it was really cool. he's the shizzle... pete sang, and this girl called in and said how great he was, plus they talk some about jason mraz in his interview, so go check out the stories he has to tell. and then he also did a musical review of lord of the rings, which was apparently great. i didn't understand much, probably because i haven't seen any of the movies.. but it'll make you lotr lovers out there smile.

the hottness that is pete thurston

pete sings great, plays a mean guitar and is a great guy. love him. let him rock your body.

sorry it's been so long since i blogged. i kept wanting to blog, but when it actually came down to do it i was too tired or didn't feel like it anymore :P. not that any of you care- all three of you. i did get hounded by manny's infamous "journal nazi" but when i told him that it was sweet that he cared, he told me not to put words in his mouth. punkass.

i was going to put a happy bday message for my mom... but i forgot, and now it's not worth is because her bday has passed and she doesn't read this thing anyways (thank god). but her birthday was last friday for all of you to know (dec 19) send lots of money and gifts to my house next year.. i'll make sure she gets it :) i bought her her favorite kind of cake from this japanese bakery called bon jour (go figure).. but it's this really good coffee cake. expensive too.. $25. but it's my mommy right? joan and jeff-gu came back home and we (plus my mom's friends the kuo's) went to go eat at this chinese vegetarian restaurant "house of vege" sounds enticing huh? it's alright, and it's a place where my mom can eat everything.. so it's her birthday.. whatever she wants. good thing i had a big lunch though. we had our holiday potluck and gift exchange at work. it was good.. did even less work than usual (if that's possible) :P and ate lots of food. speaking of which, this temp job is bad for me.. i sit on my butt all day and just eat food the everyone brings in.. i had six donuts last week.. i'm going to have a bus driver booty soon. really really really need to utilize that gym membership next year... i would say that would be my new year's resolution.. but who keeps those things? no one.. :P

in other exciting news... yay!!! my cousin had her baby, lily anna wong (aww.. how pretty), last friday (same bday as my mom!). i'm sure she's cute as heck, i wish i could see her. maybe if i move to new york :P i wish i could be the cool aunt and buy her lots of stuff.. i just may be.. we'll see. baby gap!!

i got my dawson's creek season 2 dvd that i ordered from amazon.com.. YAY!!!!!! i haven't had time to watch it.. but knowing that i have it makes me tingle all over. the box is so gorgeous. :P and plus its the season where dawson and joey are together... aww... the good episodes. the only ones that beat that are the episodes with chad michael murray. hott. i long for the day that i just hole up in my room, and watch my felicity and dawson dvd's. hell yes. plus sex in the city season 5 is coming out soon. shibby. although sex in the city has warped my brain. i was at the sharper image with vivian and we were "testing out" the massage chairs and there was a table full on "interesting" massagers.. hahaha.. vivian told me that's when we know when we watch too much sitc. :P but i love it.

wednesday i went to go see rent with nicole. i LOVE LOVE LURVE rent. i wasn't sure about this cast... but it was awesome. and i have a new boyfriend... dan domenech. he was just in the swing and also "paul" but he sang really really well and was quite the cutie. it was my fourth and half time seeing it and everytime is always great. i got all the tinglies and mouthed along to all the songs (i'm such a geek). the guy who played collins was AWESOME. he made nicole bawl. it was also funny because 'mark' reminded us of joe bussiere (too bad beth didn't come) and 'angel' reminded us of pic.. interesting.. haha.. it was very spur of the moment because i had forgotten it was playing in la again (i had heard numerous commercials on the radio at work, but since them forgot) but it was advertised on my ticketmaster email that i get. so i looked it up and it was playing at the wilshire and the grove in anaheim- but the grove was way too f'in expensive, so the wilshire it was. but tuesday and wedneday were the only days that we were available.. especially due to our brokeness. but the RADDEST part is that me and nicole got rush tickets. yay!!! i actually got rush tickets... i worked through lunch and left work early, drove like a semi-maniac up there but wasted 20 minutes trying to find parking. la is so confusing! but we got the second to last two rush tickets.. (i would have cried if i had just missed it... because of freaking parking). we got number 40 and 41 out of 42. phew... we sat in the second row :) and on the edge.. but i think i prefered it that way. not as much turning my head from right to left. too bad i wasn't sitting on the right side though.. near my new bf. :P but it was excellent.. i think rent will always be my favorite.. for a myriad of reasons, but also because it rocks. thanks nicole for indulging with me. we also had dinner at the red lobster down the street. their biscuits rock my world. yum.

it did make me want to go into theatre even more.. but those are always pipe dreams... we'll see. but nicole and i did come up with a plan that i was going to up with and idea, she was going to write the show and i proofread and produce and direct, and we both star in it. haha... sounds good to me.

saturday i finally got invited to beth and ryan's infamous south bay/torrance party. now i count as a "torrance person" i guess. or maybe they just invited me so i could give a jill a ride and they just wanted her there. but in any case.. it was fun. i got to play mario double dash.. and i saw a people i went to middle school with that i hadn't seen in awhile. it was trippy ... but still fun. i didn't feel as out of place as i thought i might have, and especially because there wasn't a huge amount of people there.. but i still managed to blend in. it was good to see them again... maybe it will be more frequently in the future. we too (like every other party out there) had the white elephant gift exchange. it was pretty cool and not too ruthless. lots of corroborating among the couples (freaking couples)... and ryan had no faith in my present giving skills just because i brought in a gap bag... (no time to wrap) but he ended up with the cranium cosmo due to his wonderful girlfriend beth. shame on you ryan. i am a great present giver dammit. i ended up with some hot cocoa mix that i gave to mike and traded the spongebob magnets for this space pen with jason (ryan's brother) who is like the nicest person in the world. he is the best... thanks so much for trading with me. he traded because he said that "she seems to want the pen a lot more than i do" and i know he wanted that pen a lot. how nice is that. thanks to jason.. he's going to have great present karma and i'll make it up to him :)

other than that i just worked lots.. temp job, gap. it's been busy busy at the mall with lines going to the fitting rooms or to the front door, depending on which way they swing. it's been alright, except for some of the attitude i get... because i can fix it right? i'm sorry that it's christmas and there are a million people just like you who want to buy presents and have boxes too... what would you like me to do about it? grr.. but i do like being at the register better than out on the floor, so that works to my advantage. except i was feeling pretty shitty on sunday because i got cheated and tricked and i'm supposed to be smarter than that. i guess i'm not, but my manager made me feel a little better telling me that everyone falls victim to it. but i still feel like i should be better than that. boo. next time. it rolled over and i still have this scared sense over me like i'm constantly worried that i'm going to mess up again.. but i just gotta get over it. at least it's not as bad as that time the lady cussed me out and i went to the back and cried. maybe i have tougher skin.. oh well. at least i didn't get in a lot of trouble. :( i also love how people come up and complain about how they're so tired and how they think that i should feel sorry for them. cuz i haven't been here since 7am (and for the last few days) at the hub of craziness in the mall. right. i mean.. i know it's my job and everything, so that's why i smile and say i'm doing great, but it's just funny how sometimes people just don't think. but i really do love the people who feel sorry for us and aren't demanding but just nice and ask us how we're doing. some lady even offered me $4 "for my christmas" what a nice lady. unfortunately i couldn't accept it, but she made me happy again. people like that make it bearable.

vivian called me and wanted to meet up because she was in the area, so we had cheesecake factory (yum) and then went back and braved the mall and i actually got most of my christmas shopping done (all but 1.5 presents). yay. :) now i just have to wrap them. haha.. you'll be getting your presents in a few weeks. :P i worked saturday, sunday, yesterday and tonight, and then friday night. (in addition to the temp job of course). thanks. i hope i don't get sick again. come visit me.. it'll make my day... we'll go have dairy queen.

one last thing (congrats if you made it all the way through!!) i saw this and thought it was pretty interesting. i know nicole reads wilwheaton.net a lot, so she'll enjoy this if she hasn't already heard (which i'm sure she has).. but for the rest of you to know. i had the hugest crush on him as wesley crusher (haha.. how appropriate). what a cutie:

"Congratulations to Wil Wheaton who recently joined the ranks of bloggers-turned-authors with a fancy three-book deal. Folks, don't get left out, learn How To Get A Book Deal With Your Blog. It's all good."

we had our best loss yet tonight :P 9-1. not too shabby. it would have been like 5-1 or 6-1 except for all the runs i gave up in the second to last inning due to my awful pitching. i'm sorry team.

question.. how come everytime i play on a team with ryan skophammer i get hurt. lssp- sprained my ankle, and then knocked over by some very large man. softball, i've gotten knocked down, fallen over and most recently today i got beaned by the very first hitter at the top of the game. she hit it right to me and i turn and it hit me real hard right on my right shoulder, my pitching arm. i just let the ball drop and paul or mike (i wasn't paying attention anymore) scrambled to get it why i silently moaned. they let me have a few practice pitches and they were pretty concerned and maybe took it a little easier because they were scared of hitting me (and i ducked everytime someone hit the ball after that). my shoulder is a bit sore, but i'm alright, no broken bones. we'll see tomorrow. i'm glad at least it didn't hit me in the face, and also that i was wearing my sweatshirt for that extra padding. but definitely definitely glad it didn't hit me in the face.. i don't know if i would have recovered from that, she hit it really hard. but everyone was worried and asking me if i was okay, and ryan just turns around and says, "yea she's fine.. jean's a tank." uhhh.. thanks ryan? hahaha

the BEST part was that maritza, norma and christine came down from riverside to be extra cheerleaders for our team!! they brought their "desert oasis" (but really cal poly pomona) pom poms and cheered for us, waved their pom poms and asses and made the other team jealous. :) i pitched the best when they were cheering for me. they made me smile. :) thanks girls!!! (maritza made me write that.. really i thought they were cki losers with no life... KIDDING). thanks for coming girls.. it means the world to us.. that we have supporters even if we suck. now we expect you at every game. see you there. thank you sakura for coming too. no oranges this time though. :P

and also.

happy birthday philippa!!!

you rule.

my feet are t-i-r-e-d.

i just worked 8 hours (plus 1 hour lunch) at the gap starting at 6:45am this morning. we opened at 9am, so i spend 2 hours and 15 minutes cleaning the fitting room and stocking the cashwrap. it really wasn't too bad and that's 2 hours and 15 minutes that i don't have to spend running around like a maniac trying to help people. it's a little bit of quiet time, and i can't really complain because there was a whole mess of people who had to be there at 5am to process shipment and change the displays. but i also didn't do much running around either, i trying to organize the sale racks and basically just rang people up all, which is my favorite place to be, so it's okay. but my feet still hurt.

the weekend is almost over and i'm sad, but this week there's two potlucks at my two jobs so it'll be fun. also dawson's creek season 2 comes out this tuesday.. excited i am so very much. :) i love dawson's creek, i don't care what you think. i've spent a good lot of time this weekend watching my felicity dvd's.. i think i watched like 6 or 7 episodes :) and even got my mom into a little bit of it. hehe. as i've been getting older we do a lot less of the family stuff that we used to do a lot when i was little, but tv is something that links we do as a family (sad i know.) but it's nice to see my parents watching tv together and laughing together instead of arguing all the time. it's a happy time and place.

i still have some christmas shopping to do, except i hate going to the mall if i don't have to work, and i hate staying at the mall longer when i am working because i just want to go home, and don't want to go shopping on my lunch break because my feet are too tired.. so i'm just going to have to suck it up and find a time to do it. i still don't really feel christmas-y yet even though it like less than 2 weeks away. maybe because we haven't put our tree up ... but in the piles of crap that make up my house where would it go? i did buy a few gifts today, so i feel productive enough.

we have a softball game later tonight (i think, if it doesn't start raining again). wish us luck!!! (i guess just hope that the 20 run mercy rule doesn't go into effect because i think we've given up hope of beating any other team. sad.)

i thought it was cute, very gay, but still cute.


cuddle and a kiss on the forehead - you like to be
close to your special someone and feel warm,
comfortable, and needed


What Sign of Affection Are You?
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today is friday. i would like nothing better than to just go the heck home. today and yesterday i have been quite bored and just want to go home and sleep... or at least be able to come to work in my fleece pants. it gets progressively harder and harder to find the motivation to get out of bed... so i begin to think that i'll never be able to handle a real job. i'd like to think that if i loved my job and cared about it, it wouldn't be so hard. but that's something i won't know for right now.

i found a job opening in san diego, and considered applying. i'm a little bit freaked about the prospect of moving back, which sounds weird after all the times i whine and complain about missing san diego, but it's different now. i still have a few friends left in san diego, but life is different and they all have different friends and people they hang out with, i have a fear that i would be too lonely down in sd. my life in la is definitely different than my life in san diego. and my san diego life was all because i was still in school, i wonder what it would be like without the preimposed college lifestyle.

i have to work at el gap-o tonight, i wish i could just go home and sleep. sleep is glorious. i miss my bed.

dang it.. one last post.

i LOOOOOVE this tristan prettyman & jason mraz song. i listen to it like a fiend over and over and over again.
it is the best.


Shy that way

you know your stunning
absolutely stunning
and I'm running always running

and now I'm crying
you know only cause I'm caring
and if you were more daring maybe you'd stop staring
and come over and talk to me
and tell me about how you've been waiting patiently
and how you tried but I just turned away
and I'll say, "yeah well you know, I'm shy that way"

shy that way
shy that way
maybe I'm shy that way

you know she's stunning
she's absolutely stunning
but she's always running
but ill catch up to her...

the way she keeps her distance
keepin my interest
so ill keep it consistent

maybe someday, someway, somehow, sometime
we'll get together and we'll break it down
and I'll ask, "why you gotta be so shy, why you gotta be that way?"
well maybe, baby, I like it that way

shy that way
maybe I, like it shy that way
maybe I love you so shy that way

Ok, I'm shy that way...

there's always too much talking
and I wanna just keep walking
and I keep staring, baby, keep staring
though I may not know the right things to say
I'll get it out to you one day

shy that way
shy that way

do you like it? do you like it when I'm shy
yes I like it, yes I like it, when your shy

shy that way

i never posted this, but i meant to. beth is the best. this is the AWESOME present she MADE me. shot glasses with my name on it (now my parents think i'm a raging alcoholic... thanks beth). but they're SO cool.
beth is neat.

*gasp.. i'm turning into pete... i just posted 3 times in one day. what is wrong with me! somebody stop me!

tonight was fun. we cancelled practice and beth and i hung out, ate dinner, talked about how pathetically tragic people are, letting me laugh at myself, a lot. and then i came home and watched a police chase with my daddy. too bad the guy just gave up after driving on his rims for 20 minutes. he should have at least made a run for it. make it exciting, make those cops work for their money. hahaha.. what a loser. i love police chases... can't beat la for that!

i don't really feel like writing, but i want to blog, so here goes. haah. last thursday i went with ann and william to the anaheim hob and saw jc chasez in concert. oh yea baby. it was really really good. aside from the popstar trying to be a hardcore rocker it was fun. some things here and there made me laugh, but i loved it all anyways. the funniest thing was when jc first came out on stage and he swung the microphone out and pulled it back real quick (trying to look superstar cool) and he smacked himself in the mouth. me and ann busted up laughing. of course i felt bad, but it was hilarious. i was laughing through the whole first song. the songs were different, dancey, he changed outfits a few times and had lots of scantily clad back up dancer girls. and wade robson was there.. haha.. what a cutie. it's just interesting that it was very sexual at some times, and there's all these 14 year old girls screaming and what not.. it was like.. "uhh.. sure" but i really enjoyed it, and he is sexxxy :) he sings well, and dances well and is just hunky dory. tony lucca opened for him, and that was really cool too :) a different kind of show, but good.

saturday i went to stup's wedding!! it was sooo beautiful, and amanda looked absolutely gorgeous. :) it was good to see the girls again of course.

stup's hair was so pretty!!!

sunday i went to kristin's movie shoot (the director from the play i worked on), that was fun too. i spent most of the weekend on the couch or in bed because i had a nasty case of the flu. i didn't know quite what it was but i was miserable... and i watched the news the other day and i had all the symptoms. sunday night/monday morning i slept for 16 hours. i feel better now, it seems almost like i didn't even have it because i got better so quickly... but that's a good thing, so i shouldn't jinx myself. maybe i just have a strong immune system. or at least strong recovery system. or just lots and lots of sleep is the key. but i've also noticed that this week, even though i've been going to sleep pretty late i'm still really well rested and not really that tired :) maybe that's the trick, get lots of rest during the weekend.

TooMuchPete: I'm coming in January... for real this time...
TooMuchPete: The money is all set aside
jeanyah: SERIOUS??!!!!!!
jeanyah: YAY!!!
TooMuchPete: Yeah... manny hooked me up with a side project that actually netted me some $$$.
jeanyah: i have the biggest grin on my face
jeanyah: you don't even know
jeanyah: yay for manny!
TooMuchPete: So I just want y'all to know that I worked 16 hours the week before dead week just to see you crazy people who make fun of my white boy dancing.
jeanyah: YOU ARE THE BEST!
jeanyah: we're going to have the schools, he's really coming to see me, er.. us. jk. we're also going to take him to drink and dance... i hope he practicesgreatest time ever
TooMuchPete: Hahaha... now don't get carried away.
TooMuchPete: You're going to inflate my modest ego if you're not careful.


i am SO excited that pete is FINALLY coming to california. i don't know what exactly it is, but it will be a banging good time. hehe.. even if he says he's coming to visit law before then. :) i can send him my darren's dance moves if he wants :) YAY... PETE HOLIDAY IS COMING TO CALIFORNIA!!!!

a whole work day, two naps, a lunch with my mommy, a blog, eleven emails, twenty websites read, two online gifts, 1 yahoo game and seven im conversations later the dsl is back on for the network.

i'm going to go home in nine minutes and have 5 days of work to do. oh yea.

i'm excited for average joe tonight :) she dresses up in a fat suit and watches the hidden cameras to see them talk smack about her "cousin" and then takes it off in front of them later after she says that she's heard everything. it's going to be great, they're going to wet their pants.

i'm here at work and one of the networks is down, so i can't do any work at all. i have just sit here idly and wait for it to be back up, if at all. last time i sat here for four hours until i went home. right now i am sitting here wishing that i could go home and sleep in my warm comfy bed. boo. i am also trying very hard to not fall asleep at my desk. the dsl is down on one system, but thank god it's still working on the other, so at least i have something to do, or i would possibly have cried.

i can't sleep in on weekends, because then i can't go to bed in time to wake up on monday mornings. no wonder they're the worst. i can't hack this working thing. 8-5, 5 days a week. i miss sleeping in, i miss my soap operas. i need to get a job like khay seng's- working a casino from 8pm-6am. or maybe i'll go process mail at the post office. argh... i mean i guess it would be different if it was a job i enjoyed, or even a "real" job, but it's neither. and i have to stare at computer screens all day long, now my eyes are burning, i seriously think i'm going to go blind.

sorry about all the whining, i super cranky and even more bored than usual.. and i didn't think it was possible. this weekend was cool. aside from the massive amounts of food i loaded into my loaded into my body and now none of my pants with fit :P friday and saturday i worked my oh so fun retail job. it's cool i guess, because i'm making money, but it does definitely suck that you have to go to work when your family is on holiday and going out places and what not. plus standing for many many hours in uncomfortable shoes yields not only blisters, but lots of pain. it's alright to be back at the gap though, like it's definitely different than working my computer job all day. i like the human interaction, i really wish i could work at disneyland though. too bad it ain't closer.

friday night i got to hang out with beth and she gave me another birthday gift (she made yummy yummy brownie cake. mushy and fudgey just the way it should be) but it's the coolest. she got me candy and care bear socks. when i first saw the socks in the bag i warned her that if it was some cruel joke and they were toe socks that i'd smack her with them. but they weren't :) plus she gave me a set of four double shot glasses that she personalized!! one for each letter of my name and cute little designs. they're soooooooooo great. THANKS BETH.. YOU ROCK MY NEW SOCKS OFF!! i'm going to drink from my shot glasses, wearing my new socks, while eating candy and watching felicity - and if you want to know what date it is i'll tell you by looking at my chippendales calendar. :P then we went to henessey's for dinner/snack and the kettle for dessert. i wanted to go somewhere with atmosphere, so it was cool. at the kettle we watched this guy stare at each girl's ass that walked by and looked so proud for being such a big man. we laughed at him a lot.

saturday vivian stopped by work right before my shift ended and invited me to come out with her and some friends. so i went home to rest my feet for a bit and then headed out to hermosa again. we went to the pier to this place across from sharkeez.. like fat fish fry.. something shack? all the shirts said f.f.f.f. so it was something like that. we got the sweetest parking space though :) and i just hung out with vivian and her friends jamie, james and julian. hahah.. all the j's and vivian :P i drank a good amount, threw around lots of money and talked to a few people. it was a good time, although i really wanted to dance but the lines at sharkeez and patrick malloys were ridiculously way too long. although i didn't mind the cold at all because i couldn't feel it. haha.. that's a cure to being cold :) just get smashed. after some driving back and forth and chit chatting julian (who is friends of my friends from ucsd.. small world huh?) drove us home and i drank water, drunk immed nicole and manny (sorry for my bad bad typing.. but i wasn't mean.. at all) i went to bed praying that the next morning wouldn't be too bad, and it wasn't :)

sunday i just chilled. i watched like 5 episode of felicity.. yay. it's so good. it makes me all tingly inside. too bad freaking j.j. abrams ditched it to go create alias and ruin scott foley's marriage. haha. everyone says "oh michael vartan's hot" which i fully agree, but still you should cheat of your husband (especially if it's scott foley) for anyone. what a hooker. anyways... felicity is rad... had a quick snack with vivian and then headed to my sisters to do some editing and eat dinner. i live an exciting life, i know.

so this is probably longer than you wanted to read, but i really have nothing better to do, so too bad. at least i hope you enjoyed your stay. i'll probably come back in a few minutes.


you are the "you're so dumb" happy bunny.
you are brutal in your words and enjoy putting
others down.


which happy bunny are you?
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