i'm a little freezing. when they leave the door open.. it creates this wind tunnel. and while it looks nice and bright and sunny outside. it's not.. i'm freezing. i feel kind of gross right now... i've been looking at too much porn. kidding. i ate lasagna that my boss bought for us. i had it late and thus it was cold.. which was not the yummiest.. but it was free lunch, and i had none other wise because i had to run an errand during lunch. but.. since it was lasagna.. i feel overly greasy right now.. and i think my stomach is churning trying to pump it all out. bleh. i don't feel like working on this project.. so while i'm hoarding the paper cutter for my project, i haven't actually used it yet. and i'm not really in the paper cutting project mood. oops. i have been on myspace all day... checking lack of interaction from my friends :P and checking my blogger to see if anyone's guessing more songs.. and they haven't. boo... i knew it was a bad idea to play the game.

oh well.. had a fun saturday in san diego. here are pictures because i'm too lazy to type.

if you want to see captions (and more pix) - imagestation it.

new music to check out...
pete thurston - www.petethurston.com
isaac cheong - www.sheblondeswede.com
tim corley - www.iliketim.com
saba - www.sabamusic.com
aaron bowen - www.aaronbowenmusic.com

most of them.. if not all have myspace pages as well.. where you can hear their stuff (if not found on their site). someday they're going to be huge.... HUGE.

my mom came back from taiwan and brought me lots off goodies and treats like i asked for.. egg custards (which are a lot like creme brulee which i've just realized... must be why i like it so much) and pineapple cake. yum. it's so good when you get it from taiwan... there's something about it that makes it yummier.

funny thing is.. is that the egg custards (in the six pack) my uncle bought from KFC. serious... KFC... the chicken place. they also have like noodles and stuff.. and egg custards. awesome.

so i stole this little game from pete. i missed the boat as far as everyone else doing it on their blogs at the same time.. because i'm lazy.. :P well not lazy.. but i just got busy. i wrote down the songs and said i'd finish the post later... didn't do it until now. thanks. i don't know if i even have enough readers who like to participate ... but please do.. so my blog doesn't look pathetic and unloved. :P even if you don't know... leave a comment and tell me i have horrible taste in music :P ahhaha.. i'll admit though.. some of these songs are pretty bad... but i just took the first 20 songs on shuffle. except for the song i had for the fantasmic show at disneyland.. i didn't think too many people would have known that.. so maybe it wasn't a "real" song. :P okay.. here are the rules.

1. Load up your playlist and put it on shuffle
2. Pick out a line from the first 20 songs and post them
3. Commenters should try to guess the title & artist of the song that the lines are from
4. I'll let you know, when they've been correctly guessed
5. NO CHEATING. (Yes, Googling the lyrics is cheating)


1. don't, be ashamed to cry, let me see you through, cuz i've seen a dark side too
*the pretenders - i'll stand by you (pete)
2. i'm warning you, don't ever do, those crazy messed up things that you do
*call and answer - barenaked ladies (pete)
3. you're the air that i breathe, girl you're all that i need, and i want to thank you lady
*all the i need - boyzone (linh)
4. sharp disaster in a fresh new coma, was it worth it when it was over
*am i missing - dashboard confessional (pete)
5. she'll let you into the parts of herself, that'll bring you down

6. i can use my tears, to bring you home

7. how can i help it if i think you're funny when you're mad
*one week - barenaked ladies (pete)
8. i want to kiss your lips and hold you close if that's alright

9. make the man within me, desire the woman in you

10. now we can swim any day in november
*sleeping in - postal service (luc)
11. call to you so clearly, but you don't want to hear me

12. too many, things i do not care for, but thing that i adore

13. the reason i breathe is you, boy you got me blinded
*baby one more time - britney spears (linh)
14. well in case you failed to notice, in case you failed to see
*foolish games - jewel (pete)
15. we're the coolest kids and we take what we can get
*soco amaretto lime - brand new (luc)
16. tonight i wanna dance with someone else
*into the groove - madonna (pete)
17. the wind is gone, asleep at dawn, the embers burn on

18. there was a time when i was all alone, waiting for someone to call my own

19. your love is what makes my heart break

20. the way you kiss me crazy, baby you're so amazing
*eighth world wonder - kimberly locke (linh)

yaaaaay. leave guesses in the comment box... i'll come back and see which friends are the smartest. you don't want to be a dumb friend do you? :P send your friends over too... i'm desperate for this post to be loved.

free ben & jerry's!!

on aprl 19th. sounds yummy. and probably crowded. but maybe worth it.

mmm.. half baked, phish food, chocolate fudge brownie. mmmm.....

so.. i guess they let you pick usernames on myspace now.. so it's not all complicated when you want to post a link to your myspace :) the ones i wanted were all taken over by 16 year olds (which is sad that i'm either hanging out where all the high school kids are or they're trying to crash our party :P) but it's funny that a lot of them were asian too. like.. is jean a really popular name about asian parents? because i always thought my name was too plain.. nobody had my name growing up. except my favorite 3rd grade teacher. ahhaha. i wanted a "cool" name like jennifer or kimberly.. they were like princess names.. hahahah with more than one syllable. but this is a tangent. so anyways... jean and jeaner were taken.. and jeanh seemed to plain, and i didn't want to put jeanyah out there, just in case the wackos went on a googling spree. i try to keep my blog hidden from myspace/friendster... just because i don't know who's out there. i've had some creepy experiences. haaha. but it would be cool to have a monopoly on the name. i already have that girl on webdate trying to be me. hahaha.

anyways.. if you're on myspace.. add me (if we're friends that is.. :P) and if we're not.... maybe we will be soon :)
www.myspace.com/jeanish

do you like the name?

so.. i have a few posts that are in draft phase.. waiting to be finished and posted.. delayed by new projects and busy work at work. but this trumps them all.. so i had to post about it.

Spears Reveals Pregnancy on Her Website

hahaha.. i totally called it in my last post. hahah. thanks to sakura for the news :P

and while i'm here.. if you applied/attended berkeley grad schools in the past few years.. or received doctorates from cal you should check out this site. http://idalert.berkeley.edu/. i guess info was stolen .. so you should check if you're one of the groups. it kind of sucks.. i got a letter saying that my info was stolen from UCSD. what's up with that? and then like a few month later sakura got the letter.. but what's with the big gap in time. it's weird.. is this the new fad in ID theft.. stealing from college databases.

yikes.

posts and pictures coming soon.. i hope :P

boooo.. sucky. i've been waiting up because my sister is coming home from vegas today. my dad asked me if i wanted to spend the night at my sister's... and i said sure..since a lot of my stuff is there - including my much needed to be done laundry. so my dad was going to pick her up and bring her back home and then i was going to take her up to her house. i asked him if he wanted me to just pick her up, so then i could just take her home, and there wouldn't be this back-tracking. and he says.. no.. it's okay.. i'll pick her up.

so he leaves for the airport, and i wait around.. wasting time on the internet, loading pictures, myspacing it, trying to dig for dirt... so i get a call from my sister.. and i'm like "well my dad left awhile ago.. she shouldn't be calling to ask where he is" but then she tells me she's at home and i'm like "you got a ride home and daddy's circle the airport looking for you?" but none of the above. my dad took my sister home and she was calling wondering if i was still coming over. i like going to her house because sometimes we'll watch tv together and it's really fun and funny.. and better than watching tv by yourself. but the maiin reason why i like it is because the commute isn't a killer in the morning. i take local fairly uncrowded streets and it takes me like 20 minutes. it's very nice.. and i get that extra 30 minutes of sleep. so anyways... i've been waiting up for the past hour because i thought i had to wait for her to come back and i had to drive her up there. but no... everything went askew. and the reason it sucks is because i am DEAD tired... and i really wanted to take a nap.. but i didn't.. because i knew it would only be more tired. so.. i stayed up.. tired.... waiting.. and she's already at home (i guess my dad just took her home because she was super tired too). it just sucks because i totally could have went to sleep at like 9:30. grr.

and now i'm blogging.. wasting more time of course. well.. now i'm uploading pictures so i'll have sometimes semi-interesting to do other than than the ultra tedious new task i have. i'm so over it already. grr. :P

night y'all.

one last thing.... speaking of y'alls.. i was reading the latest USweekly mag. argh.. i can't believe that brad and angelina are together. i totally think britney is pregnant. and mandy moore and zach braff. wow.

got this from a guy at work. now i understand :P

so i stole this from kelly.. who found it here it's like a test to see how observant you are... it's interesting... you should try to take it :) no cheating.. looking at stuff around you/on your desk to figure out the answers. and of course.. no internet :P hahahah.. the average is 7.. which i think is actually really low. but.. hmmm... i got 15.. haha. well like 14 and two half answers. hahaha. what about you? the answers will be in my comments. :)

1. On a standard traffic light, is the green on the top or bottom?
2. How many states are there in the USA? (Don't laugh, some people don't know)
3. In which hand is the Statue of Liberty's torch?
4. What six colors are on the classic Campbell's soup label?
5. What two numbers on the telephone dial don't have letters by them?
6. When you walk does your left arm swing with your right or left leg?
7. How many matches are in a standard pack?
8. On the United States flag is the top stripe red or white?
9. What is the lowest number on the FM dial?
10. Which way does water go down the drain, counter or clockwise?
11. Which way does a "no smoking" sign's slash run?
12. How many channels on a VHF TV dial?
13. On which side of a women's blouse are the buttons?
14. Which way do fans rotate?
15. What is on the back of a Canadian dime?
16. How many sides does a stop sign have?
17. Do books have even-numbered pages on the right or left side?
18. How many lug nuts are on a standard car wheel?
19. How many sides are there on a standard pencil?
20. Sleepy, Happy, Sneezy, Grumpy,Dopey, Doc. Who's missing?
21. How many hot dog buns are in a standard package?
22. On which playing card is the card maker's trademark?
23. On which side of a Venetian blind is the cord to turn them up and down?
24. On the back of a Canadian $1 coin, what is in the center?
25. There are 12 buttons on a touch tone phone. What 2 symbols bear no digits?
26. How many curves are there in the standard paper clip?
27. Does a merry-go-round turn counter or clockwise?


other random stuff... i was going to post about google maps but pete beat me to it. boo.. now it just doesn't seem as exciting if i do it now.. just the second hand post. or as carlene likes to call me "poor man's" haha.. so yea.. it's neat because you can view stuff and search for nearby restaurants and stuff and it'll show you visually where everything is.. which is good for people who suck at directions (like me :P) ahhaha. i was going to post where my house is, and post my friend's houses.. maybe i'll do that later. but it seems super neato. go to pete's post for a "better" review and a view of his hometown :P

i also forgot to say that i had a lovely dinner with beth at c&o cucina (italian for kitchen?) near my work in venice. it was yummy and we both got plates enough for 3 or 4 meals... plus all the garlic balls we could ever want. it was fun and i'm glad that when beth happened to be in my area around the time that i was getting off she called me and we hung out. i did get that free dessert coupon that i haven't used yet.. so we'll have to go back. if what i'm saying all sounds like nonsense (which i'm sure it does) visit beth's recap, because it's a lot better than anything i could muster up. i meant to link to it awhile ago.. instead of posting my own of course, but the hand off post even got put aside. hahah. you can even read about the lady who tried to hit and run.. but got caught. hah.

also.. my friend pete is stirring up trouble again. he must be bored or something.. but he and his posse are back with a vengeance. hehehe.. visit the action at http://www.unofficialcki.org pete is my muse.. i already told him i was going to make a movie about all these shenanigans. we just couldn't decide who'd play him in the movie :P hi-larity.

i think is this pretty interesting... someone got arrested and is facing jail time for SPIM - which is spam, but through IM.. so i hear. this is the "buzz" at myspace. or really just some link i click off my bulletin board. but it's about everyone's friend - tom :)

and netflix is only $11.99 now.. maybe i really should join! especially now that i have discovered my comp at work has a dvd player. har har har har har.

i LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE that it's 7pm and i'm off work and it's still nice and bright outside!!! yaaaaaay. :)

now i don't feel like such a work wench.

yay for sunshine :)

gosh.. i don't even know when's the last time i posted about "my life" like a this is what i did, there is where i went, and this is what i ate. (i know you miss that last part, especially pete :P) but don't worry.. i won't bore you with the long saga that would take forever to read and write (more importantly).. or maybe that would just make me even more tired than i am on this monday morning. grrr... monday.

last week this guy left our work, and we had had previous conversations about how he doesn't really like sweets, or cheesecake that my boss buys everyone for their birthday. but he did like big macs.. so i made him a "cheeseburger cake" i forgot that burger patties shrink when cooked, so it didn't turn out to be the 9inch masterpiece i had hoped for.. but it basically came out a giant cheeseburger. but it was fun and the guy liked it.. so everything works out eh? i took pictures for your viewing pleasure as well. or maybe i just wanted a giant cheeseburger on my blog :P

my biggest dilemma was how was i going to get a "giant bun" i thought about just using pieces of white bread fitted together, but that would be messy. or i thought about buying that pilsbury dough in the tube and trying to make a bun out of that. i had my moment of eureka when i saw the giant sourdough buns. i ideally wanted to make the burger that big, but since i over estimated the size of the patties, i actually ended having to cut off the bread all around the bun. but... the patties was over a pound of meat, so i figured it didn't need to be any bigger. i think maybe i didn't keep them super thin, and maybe that's why the patties becamse smaller, because they were thicker. anyhoo.. it looked good.. who's birthday is coming up? :P

my dad came home last night. my mom was supposed to come back as well, but decided to postpone it i suppose to do some more stuff, hang out until my sister comes back. me and my dad had this "tiff" over time change and he said that i was late in picking him up because i forgot about the time change (not true) and on his itinerary and ticket it said 8:35, but he wa like "no! you should have come at 7:35! all these are wrong" hah.. sure daddy. his plane actually did land early (8:06) which is what caused him to wait - wasting his 50cents to call me to see where i was, and $3 for the parking structure fee (i miss the metered parking). if he had just called me earlier i could have just picked him up curbside.. but he thought he'd wait around. nerd.

angelee (my best friend from hs) came to town last weekend because her fam was going on a cruise to mexico. niiice. :) she came in earlier and i took the day off (slacker.. i know) so we could hang out. it was tons of fun, just driving around, seeing familiar places and just catching up. had a mini high school friends dinner and then tried to catch my work party.. but didn't quit make it in time for the free booze.. just the social company. hahah.. boo. i dragged angelee to my sister's house and made her wait for a bit for the water heater people to fix it, but she made me steal salad dressing, so i think it's fine :P

went to dave and busters last friday night. hung out with some of the old cki crowd, and of course when you put old cki'ers together, you inevitably begin talking about "the old days." haha.. it made me miss circle k a little bit, and missing volunteering and all that stuff. sure i could go candy stripe or someting (wait.. with what hours of the day?) but i do miss being in that kind of organization and being able to do all different types of projects (with my short attention span and all). and organizing stuff to do. i don't know what it is exactly. i think the project i miss most was working with the kids at the battered shelter. aww.

my gmail account now had 2gigs of space. now if only i had people who emailed me :P

i'm tired. i would love nothing more than to go home and just sleep. and it's so freezing cold outside.. despite it being super sunny. what's up with that? i miss my fleece pants. this day can not be short enough for me.

RIP jeff's mom.

"nothing worth having comes easy"

aww.. as quoted on tonights scrubs.. along with howie day's collide. awww.. i would cry if i was that type of girl. like beth :P it was weird though because it was back to back episodes about parental death. it was like a sign or something. interesting.

*sigh*

i don't know why i always wait until the last minute when i get these urges to blog. why didn't you do it when you needed something to do? this won't be long or comprehensive. i haven't posted about what i've been doing in awhile. if i decide to it will be one of those HUGE long ass posts that everyone complains about and probably won't read anyway.. so we'll see. but.. i did turn in my papers for benefits today. yay. as of the end of this week i can go see the doctor. yay.. not that i've really gone in the past year and half or so.. out of lack of insurance and lack of necessity (except that time i got beaned with the line drive to my chest.. but i'm alive right?).. i can go to the dentist, optometrist, doctor paid by my company.. and if i die i get $20,000... who wants to be my beneficiary. hahah. i have a eye doctor appt on apr 2nd.. my second day of coverage. hehe.. i waste no time. yay for new glasses.. finally. and contacts.. although i'll probably have to pay for one.

ooookay.. time to go home. finally.

having a three day weekend makes work on monday that much harder.

*oops* sorry to the people who caught this post times six. haha.. it kept not posting, and i kept trying over and over again (as you saw).. i guess it was working, but on a delayed schedule. hahah.. but now it's fixed. hurrah.

happy birthday joan!! :)

naaasty.

kabahead: http://www.cnn.com/2005/US/03/24/chili.finger.reut/
kabahead: that is NASTY
jeanyah: i think i just heard about this on the radio!!
jeanyah: ewwwww
kabahead: haha
kabahead: SICK!!
jeanyah: yea... the guy on the radio said it was fully cooked but not decomposed
kabahead: ewwwww
kabahead: fresh finger
jeanyah: yuk
kabahead: this puts a new meaning to "finger-licking good"
jeanyah: ew keri...
jeanyah: gross

today this guy said to me "i heard a lot of people died in the tsunami because they didn't know how to swim."

omg. are you serious? genius.

i opened this window up 1 hr and 44 minutes ago.. but have been wasting time on other windows since then. oops. so now i have 13 minutes to write.. this will be quick.

did you feel it? i did... it was a little rattling. haven't felt one in awhile.. but it was a sharp jolt. short though. some people thought i was crazy at first.. but i'm not. don't doubt me man :P it's kind of scary that the earthquake was in the ocean.. so near my house. it wasn't as big... so not too much to be worried about. and a lot of people didn't even feel it.. so no biggie.. but jarring a little. at least i'm not sitting underneath the stairs like my counterpart in the other building. hahahaha.

rain, thunder and lightning oh my!!

in addition to the small earthquake we had a fast on coming storm that probably totally messed up the freeways for my drive home. (because it's ALWAYS about me :P) it was decently nice this morning and then the grey rolled in, and then the sprinkling and then LOTS OF IT.. pouring down. it was funny to watch everyone come in through the doors with the same "argh rain!" expression on their face. everyone asks me "where does that rain come from?" or "oh my it's raining so hard" like this is new to me, or the person before them didn't just say the exact same thing. but i just smile, grin and bear it and laugh like i am really amused because it's new to them. see.. my job is important :P

SJP is no longer the face of gap.. her contract is up and now they're going to use joss stone. blech.. i don't know why but i am not a fan of that girl. i don't get it. this article makes it sound worse than it really is. but i think the posters have been SO awesome lately. cuteness.

starting saturday and for a week+1 i'll be by myself ... someone come hang out with me please. i need the company.. i'll cook you dinner! who wants to come over and play? i will be sad and lonely.

a lot of theivery has been going on lately. sucks.. sakura lost her phone and some korean lady and hispanic guy who answered wouldn't really talk to her or pick up the phone afterwards. and then someone at my work stole this guy todd's jr kings jacket and wallet from his equipment bag while he was playing a game. BOO.. i hope karma gets you people.

the water heater @ my sister's house conveniently didn't want to leak while the plumber was out there to check it out, but now the problem has come back.. of course. gotta deal with the insurance and plumbing companies again.. grrr... trying to get it fixed before they return. its hard when you work 8:30am-7pm.... who's gonna want to help you outside of those hours?

lois and clark the new adventures of superman dvd comes out june 7th... WAHOO!!!

okay... enough babbling for now... time to goooo hooooome!

stay safe and dry kiddos.

ugh... i just finished doing my taxes. i feel so sad. before i've always gotten back money.. but this year i have to pay. yuk. i hate being a grown up.

and most of all... when you're using turbo tax.. and it says "balance due".. i was thinking.. 'due to me'.. not i "due" to them. they should not make those numbers green.. like it's a good thing. it's totally misleading... they should be red.. blood red... cuz it's blood money.. yuk.

ps... i've only saved like 1/4 of the money i earned from last year.... what is up with that?!

argh... no fun.

guy from my work jim: what's that really bad smell?
me: apparently it's some sort of sewage smell coming from the stage
jim: really, it's awful
me: i don't really smell it
jim: no?
me: yea.. i can't tell at all
jim: well maybe that's because you smell like poo anyways.


gee.. thanks.

happy st. patrick's day!

i drove by this bar called "brennan's" on main street in marina del rey/venice and at 8:30am it was already packed with more girls in green tube tops going in. i don't know if they're there to drink green beer or what.. but really.. it's 8:30 in the morning!! and don't you have work? hahaha.. maybe i'm just jealous. but i never realized that it was such a big deal to some people. one of the guys who works here took today off i know that :P but i just thought it was hilarious that from the street i could hear the crowd inside... i bet it was busy last night and will be PACKED tonight.. if people can even get in. yikes. 8:30 in the morning though? can't you sleep in and then drink green beer?

eh.. oh well... they're having fun though i bet.

there's also a lot of people at my work not wearing green. i thought people would totally get into it here.. but they're just kind of whatever about it :P i asked this one girl why she wasn't wearing green and she said because "she wasn't irish" .. so where you have the super st. patrick's day people, you have the extreme opposite. i guess it makes sense, but st. patrick's day was always such a fun holiday.. i don't know why i'm so compelled to wear green.. but maybe i'm just a sucker for hallmark stuff like that. :P

if i didn't have so much junk to take care of .. i'd totally tell linh that we should meet up at henessey's for "irish donuts." mmm.. yummy.

alright... move on to easter already.. i'm eating chocolate eggs right now :P

*excited for*
-benji coming back
-angelee coming to visit
-a week by myself

*sad for*
-jeffgu's family
-untaken trips

*stressed out by*
-all the stuff that needs to be done by tomorrow
-water heater troubles

*need to*
-go to disneyland
-finish recording american idol (plus others)
-go shopping for stuff to take back to taiwan
-catch up on sleep
-clean my house
-stop eating these chocolate eggs

"If anyone was still wondering what happened to the overzealous 'tween fans of 'Nsync and Britney Spears, the answer is now obvious: They grew up (just a bit) and became enamored of pop-rock artists like Gavin DeGraw."

this was the opening sentence of a review of the wb one tree hill concert in last friday's variety. friggin hilarious...

so i'm too tired or blah or whatever to blog.. so i'm just going to have pictures. which is sill because it takes more effort for me to load pictures and encode them and figure out layout and sizing.. as opposed to just rambling.. but then i have to think about how to make it somewhat entertaining and interesting and i'm not in the entertaining and interesting mood


WB ONE TREE HILL CONCERT



*"brooke" and "mouth" the hosts of the show
*tyler hilton

*"jake" <3 and tyler hilton
*the wreckers

*a very pregnant michelle branch
*some of the cast and tyler hilton saying thanks and fooling around with camera phones

*gavin degraw



RACHAEL YAMAGATA @ HOTEL CAFE


*the sold out rachael yamagata show i tried to go to. she came out and played in the alley way for all the people who were hopelessly waiting to see her. how nice!



THE ONE YEAR CELEBRATION




*drunk and cameras do mix



PHANTOM PLANET & MAROON 5



*phantom planet
*cell phones are the new lighters


*hotness

*this girl threw vivian's bra on-stage. vivian's bra on stage with adam levine

as always, more pictures can be found @ my imagestation.

*see benji.. you wanted more pictures.. and you got them. although i bet you won't even find this until next month. ps. i didn't do this for you, this comment was an afterthought.

oooh. i know it's silly to get excited over something that's just a cover. but i am. and the book doesn't even come out until july. hahaha. sweeet.

i am also very excited about the one tree hill tour that i'm going to tonight. yay! i know i was all mopey and retarded before. and then later that week i watched another episode of one tree hill which had a small gavin degraw performance and it made me excited again. i know... i'm so easy. i saw gavin on leno monday night and got excited all over again. and i've been listening to some wreckers and tyler hilton songs i "acquired".. so i'm pretty jazzed. just because i am looking forward to all three acts you know? it's not just going to see the main guy and wondering who the opener(s) are. i just hope i don't miss anything too significant before i get there since it friggin starts at 7:20pm.

AND i found out that rachael yamagata is playing at hotel cafe tomorrow!! yay! i was going to stay in tomorrow night, but i can't really pass that up. she's been touring in japan and is going to SXSW.. none of those things i can do... so i am stoked about tomorrow night. i have jill to thank for introducing me to her.. but i'm sad that she is not here to enjoy it with me. come back soon!! anyone else want to come? she was on the OC a few weeks ago.. for you pop culture-ites. she was playing in the club where alex was watching and mischa barton's character ..(coop?) came and they held hands. hahah. i don't usually watch this show, but i have been watching lots of tv i don't ordinarily watch in order to record it on to dvd for my overseas sister. it's okay.. but i definitely don't LOVE it like i do one tree hill. hahahah.

today is a slow day... slower than most.. or it just seems that way. yesterday i passed a good 3.5/4 hours reading cosmo that this other girl bought. the jessica alba interview, 65 ways to make your man tingle, and secrets about your body. or something like that. it was a good time killer though :) today... time killer of choice is blogging. after i've already checked my email a few dozen times, bought felicity season 4 today.. YAY.. and went on a text messaging rampage... i'm still looking for stuff to do.

the massage lady comes to our work tuesdays and wednesdays and offers massages in the afternoon. i send out the email and people will call me to sign up, or just come sign up themselves. before.. it was just kind of like a few appointments here and there. the past two times she's been pretty booked. she charges her customers $1/minute. today she is making $175 for 4 hours of work, plus whatever tips she may be geting. geez.

while checking out the different prices for felicity season 4 i came upon a warner brothers coupon t hat says if you buy multiple sets of seasons for various dvds, you can get a rebate. the more seasons you buy, the bigger the rebate of course. so i checked out the coupon to see which box sets qualify. the usual: friends, one tree hill (which are very exciting though.. because i want to get them.. eventually. especially one tree hill!!) hahah. some other sucky ones.. and then i noticed "lois and clark: the new adventures of superman" *GASP* really? has this come out on dvd? how did i miss it?! for those of you who don't know.. i loooooved (and still do.. but not quit as obsessively) dean cain. he was the cat's meow. hahah.. that sounded lame. sorry. but i liked him very very much, and that made me not like so much teri hatcher. so much that i didn't really even want to watch desperate housewives because of her. but since i had to watch it to record it on to dvd for my sister, i love that show now.. i still don't like her character very much. hahah. anyhoo... i frantically searched the internet for these alleged dvd's, and this coupon would be my ticket to getting however many seasons of lois and clark were out, plus one tree hill. :) but.. it won't be out until "summer 2005" but the coupon is only valid until june... SO.. it MUST come out before that... hehehehehhe.. i am excited. i LOVE it.. another collection to add of my already too many dvd's. plus it's dean cain.. where i have a few episodes of that show on vhs already. i also have my own collages that i made, cutting out every picture from magazines, newspapers, tv guides. and on one of them i think i even made up my own sloagan and wrote it alongside the pictures. i even have the large black and white posters somewhere... but it's funny because before him i had a ginormous love for luke perry. and when brenda was in paris and met "reeque" i was so angry than she could do that to dylan for that lame-o not even cute guy. hahah.. and then later when watching re-runs i yelled at my tv.. "GO FIND HIM, HE'S WAITING FOR YOU... HE'S WAAAAAY BETTER THAN DYLAN." dylan, btw was cheating on her with her best friend, (but better with) kelly. but anyways.. that is a tough decision. i have large posters of both of them. hahahahahha. i even have 90210 trading cards. i spent all of my money and every afternoon going to the "cigarette" store in the same plaza as steve's and little caesar's buying packs and packs of 90210 trading cards. i don't remember why i was so feverishly obsessed with them... but i was. 90210 is my ringtone on my cell phone now (i'm giving toxic a break) :P whenever it rings it makes me smile.

anyhow.. i am excited.

how hot is he. i melt at the smoldering look. hahhahahaha.

i stole this from maurene... she's all cute and in love i'm sure so it has a different meaning. but it gives me hope at least.. right? :P

you've gotta know
that there's someone for you
strange as you are
-jon brion

awwww.. poor joey potter!!!

holmes, klein break engagement

i don't think they're still together since it says they're still "good friends" how sad. if she can't make it work.. who can?

although this is good news for pete. she's single and waiting for you. :P

so my work's "yearlies" were tonight. it was a showcase of some of the work we've done in the past year. showed a few commercials, and movies that we did visual effects for.. the day after tomorrow and i, robot. also the trailer for stealth. it was exciting.. probably would have been better if the volume was turned higher... and indicated by the people near me yelling "volume!!" "crank it!!" but it seemed fun. i bet it is really exciting for other artist to see the work, because they're the ones who can really appreciate and know exactly how much work and effort it takes. or for you to see your work up there, with fellow co-workers. hmm.. i can't wait until next years so that i can be like "i remember when they were working on that project!"

beth came and my parents came plus one friend. beth was supposed to come for the 7pm showing and my parents the 8pm, but because of the mess of parking situation and the sucky security guard, beth had to stick around until 8pm. we ate food, chit chatted and waited for my parents to show and then i had to try juggling hosting my parents at my new job and entertaining my friend beth. i showed them my kick ass desk that i work at. haha.. i keep meaning to take pictures to post it.. but i keep forgetting. my mom was like "you want to take pictures??" but there was too many people around so i didn't feel like embarassing myself too much.

thanks A LOT to beth and my parents for coming, i hope it was fun and not too geeky or boring and not a complete waste of your early friday night. i do really appreciate you showing support.. even if you had no interest in it at all, or that i was a brat about it :P i hope you had a good time!! and if not.. at least you got some free food and beer.

so i was outback eating cereal on my break.. and overheard a conversation. it wasn't something that was super secretive, but not really anything that was important for me to know... in the business sense at least. it's good to know at least in a social sense .. just so that i can be aware.

there was this guy who used to work here, i guess for a long time. i never had met him because i started after the new year. but i got an email (that was distributed to the whole company) saying that this guy who was vacationing in thailand with his girlfriend had still been missing after the families had hired a private investigator, and although they didn't want to give up hope, there was only so much you can do you know? they still hoped for the best.. a miracle.

a few weeks ago they had a reception/memorial for this guy at our work, for his friends, family and co-workers. i didn't go but it started as i was getting off, and there were quite a bit of people gathering. they made up these nice programs and really just wanted to celebrate his life.

today my overheard conversation was that they found his body. it's kind of a .. i don't even know. they didn't find his girlfriend's body, but it's a little over 2 months later and it's closure, but also kind of sad. i guess the options were that they could ship the body back as is, or they could cremate it and then ship that back. i started thinking about what i personally would choose, and i'm not really sure. i mean.. everyone says "no one wants to see the body that decomposed" and while that's true, would it make it any easier to say goodbye (again)? i am no fan of dead bodies, or decomposing ex-living things.. heck i don't even like to be in, around or near cemetaries, but ashes seem so much less if you hadn't had a chance to say goodbye. i don't know... i can't fully wrap my mind around that stuff.

there was a guy who went to my high school that died while he was backpacking in spain. i think i vaguely knew him, i think he was the kid who used to bug me while on the bus. sweet annoying harmless freshmen... but they had the body shipped back and i guess there was a service.... i can't really fully understand, but it's just something to think about. sorry for being morbid on a friday.

oh yea.

i am in an antisocial pityparty kind of mood. and i think i'm starting to come down with something. no good. i am glad that i have my box of tissues handy. i might just take it home. hahah.

i have a few shows lined up that i feel like bailing on. there's the one tree hill tour with tyler hilton, gavin degraw and the wreckers. it's sold out.. i'm thinking about ebaying them and making a few bucks... especially since they changed the time to 7:20pm... wtf man! but will i regret not going to the show? i've not had the best luck selling stuff on ebay.. but who knows.

the sunday after i'm supposed to go to maroon5 with viv and her bf (.. the joys of thirdwheelness) but they are pit tickets... so it'll be kind of good right? i haven't seen them before, except at pepsi smash.. but i imagine it'll be a good show, if it's not too crowded. but.. i kind of feel like bailing on that.. it is a sunday night. but i don't want to leave her stranded with just one ticket.

in april.. i have coachella day 1 tickets... that show isn't sold out yet, so they're not going for very much on ebay yet. i'm kind of like .. wow that's a lot of money that i don't NEED to be spending, and it's all day in BFE and who knows if i want to go. plus.. this show and the one tree hill show i don't have anyone to go with.. so what's up with that....

i just feel like doing nothing. so i'm going to go home and do that now.

yuk.. it's raining... again... not that i hate rain or anything.. today is just not the day i want to deal with people's (and mother nature's) shit. but i am glad that i got my umbrella out of the car earlier. fcuk rain. i hope there's not a buttload of traffic.

i could watch this kid all day long.

i know it's kind of weird, and kind of sad, because he's all embarassed now, and so it's almost like you're laughing at him.. and not with him. but it's not mean laughter... it's joy.. because it's so cute and amusing. and the song is very catchy. i know this video has probably been around the internet and back.. but i just caught with of this this weekend. so it's this kind lip syncing to this polish(?) song maybe. i'm not sure what language it's in, but he does this flailing dance in his chair, along with synchronized gestures and facial expressions. it's great. watch either the version with or without subtitles. but not he original version because then enter weird flashes of pictures. i don't like it.. it takes away from the dancing. he's awesome.

this weekend was good. last night i felt like i had a really good weekend and it seemed long, but this morning i realized it's way too short. last week thursday and friday i worked in a different department since i was covering for a girl who was on vacation. it's different, change of pace, change of scenery, change of tasks and people. it's almost like having a brand new job :P plus i got free lunch both days. hahah. friday night i met up with vivian and her bf josh for her belated birthday dinner. my food was okay. i didn't feel like cracking crab shells, so i had the crab cake sandwich, and it wasn't so yummy. but the really good chocolate cake made up for it. so i guess that's okay :P saturday was errands, napping and just a lot of resting. had dinner with kyle @ tgi friday's. i haven't been there in a while.. so it was really good.. if that makes any sense. it's a lot busier than i remember it being. when we left at like 10 or so people were still waiting to eat. crazy. sunday was work in the morning, napping in the middle and then off to my first work party!! yay.. i feel so grown up and everything. my hot date was sakura :) and it was really cute. they made a pseudo-red carpet and had strobe lights and sound fx of cameras going off.. so it was like you were walking up the aisle of paparazzi. it was cute. and then dinner was good and dessert was even better. and sitting in round table style.. like you were at an awards show.. with the cool decorations and big screen. it was fun. people from our company were nominated for visual fx for i, robot. peopel were antsy up to that point, and when the people came out on stage people were cheering and stuff. and when they announced i, robot the whole room cheered.. (as if it would make a difference right?) but it was infectuous cheering, and then sad when we lost. our ceo stood up and said "drinks on me!" and went towards the open bar. har har har.. it was funny though because the features execs were super duper nervous about the visual fx category. of course.. who wouldn't be right? but right before they announced there were all sitting there... probably holding their breath, and one had her head in her hands. and do you know what i thought of? stupid scrapbook awards and how nervous me and sakura used to get. and it wasn't for anything like an oscar, but we all act the same way. ahhaha.. and we're all pissed off the same when you don't win :P after that some people didn't care.. and lot of people just stood in the back and chatted and drank until the show was over, then there was a band and then a dj and dancing. it was fun.. and i had a few good conversations with people. it's kind of nice bonding outside of work (even though we're still.. at work i guess). but it's nice to be sociable. i wore one of nicole's dresses that's on permanent loan to me (she said i could have it.. i swear i didn't steal it) to the party and i got SO many compliments. i told them all that i stole it from a a friend and they told me to "keep it" and "good job." i probably shouldn't mention it because then nicole might want her dress back.. but i love it. haha. and apparently so did everyone else. tonight i'm going to a work party at nicole's. oh i feel so adult! work parties! :P

now for the obligatory pictures.

so i got this page from pete... a canadian couple was vacationing in thailand when the tsunami hit, and they were at the beach and were taking pictures. their camera was found, and they were able to pull the pictures off the memory card. so you can see the beach and the water. it's kind of sad, kind of scary, kind of... i don't know... i'm glad that the kids can find comfort in it somehow, because no matter what, it happened.. this way at least they can kind of share with their parents. it's weird.. when i was looking at the pictures, i feel like i expected them to be bigger, because i guess in the pictures they don't seem as huge, but just like waves up close.. but it's actually taken from really far away. but if you compare them to the other things in the picture, like the people and the boats.. you can see how big they are. it's sad, i wonder if they were standing there, knowing that they couldn't do anything else...so just taking pictures hoping that other people could know what happened. kind of like the people who made the last minute 9/11 calls. crazy :(

six more minutes... arrghhh..this has been the longest hour and a half ever!!

compounded by the fact that i am in some agonizing pain... i want my sweats and a bed. and they keep calling me to go in to work tonight. or at least that's what i'm assuming because i am avoiding their calls, so i don't actually know.

ohhhh... hurry hurry hurry.

so... i was FRRREAKING out about that ebay auction, almost had a few panic attacks, and was puzzled by nobody wanted the space mountain poster... well the auction ended (without anymore bids from me thank you very much) at $222.50. not as much as the skyway attraction, people mover or submarine ride - but those rides don't exist anymore, so i'm assuming that's why. but yea... i had a premature freak out, because i knew the disneyland crazies would come out and snatch it up... but i just imagined worst case scenario.. what if.

aww..posters.. you'll always be in my heart... and on my blog. but i can't have you in my home.. especially not for $200 or $300+ each...

this is also something i wanted.. i wonder what the end price was...for the space mountain letters. they were $355 last i looked, but that was also a few days ago. they started out at $25.. and i was totally going to bid on them too... i know.. awful. but i realized that i didn't really have anywhere to put them. see.. i'm trying to be good :)

so i feel really bad... i totally just ruined this guy's birthday surprise! and so you might be thinking "oh jean.. she can't keep secrets" but i didn't even know!! for everyone's birthday in my department the boss buys a cheesecake. and so i knew something was going on, and i took my lunch a little later than usual and i saw one guy from the department still walking around so i asked him "why aren't you at the birthday thing?" and he says "what birthday thing?" DOH... i realized that it was his birthday thing, and it was a surprise. damn. i tried to cover it up "oh wow, your eyes, are you wearing colored contacts. oh.. yea the birthday thing on friday.. how was the club? yea.. i don't think he bought it. and worse yet.. he couldn't just pretend he didn't know (out of pity for my shameless flustered unsmooth plan to salvage what was left) and act surprised, but he told my boss and everyone else there that he wasn't surprised because i had told him. i didn't "teeeelllll" him.. i just helped him figure it out.

argh.. i know it's not a huge deal, and it's not a "total" surprise because you almost expect it since they do it for everyone's birthday. but still... it sucks that i ruined it. boo. my boss said he'll just have to ruin by birthday.. haha.. what's fair is fair i guess :P

yikes.. there was this huge flash of lightning and then a even huger (is that even a word?) rumble of thunder... it was crazy. at least this time i saw the lighting so i wasn't as shocked by the thunder as last time.

have a safe drive home kids!! (actually..most of you are probably home already.. boo)

at least in my car i have my rubber tires to keep me grounded :) and i will be driving the ginormous minivan.

do you know that blink 182 broke up? or at least that's the rumor i heard on kroq.

and my friend kimmy sent me this funny email:
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER:
May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the crotch of the person who
screws up your day and may their arms be too short to scratch ... AMEN.

"you're happy you got outbid? whys that? you never wanna get out bid!"

sure.. usually that's the case. usually if you bid on something it's because you want that item and you want to pay that amount for it. but it wasn't the case this time... sure.. everyone asks me.. "why did you bid on it if you didn't want it?" it's not that i didn't want it.. i wanted it.. just not at that price.. and i bid on it because i thought it would be fun to be the first one.. or something like that.. "totally sure" that i was going to be outbid. pete told me that i need to check my "totally sure"-o-meter... when i started panicking when it had been 3 days and my bid still stood @ $150. FINALLY .. last night someone outbid me at $152.50.. which is where it's at now. thank goodness! there are similar posters that are going for $200-$300 and i wonder why the poster i bid on isn't going for more.. but at least i don't have to buy it anymore. :P

yay for 3 day weekends.. boo that it's over already. but i had a good time..so it's okay :) despite the rain i went out a decent amount and didn't really ever get caught up in the traffic accidents.. *knock on wood* they were always on the other side of the freeway or already behind me. friday i met up with some co-workers for a birthday dinner at koji's @ hollywood and highland. it was really really yummy, and i got sushi since i wasn't really feeling the shabu shabu. it's funny though because when kathy was visiting we were thinking about going there, but looked at the menu and i guess they had lunch specials later in the day and kathy was like "we'll probably come back when the specials are going on." but she was already going to leave by then and i was about to say "but kathy, you won't be here" haha, but then i realized that she just wanted to get out of there gracefully. but...i must say that it's really yummy so i'm kind of sad we didn't eat there that day. next time!! afterwards i didn't get to go to the 80's club with the co-workers, but trekked over to brea (and i do mean trekked!) to meet up with jenny, carol and sakura for pool, fun and dancing :) apparently they were waiting for me to drink.. so sakura, carol and i had a few..but it was fun. some guy asked sakura to dance and i got dragged out there too, and then there was this little really freaky asian guy and his friend that bump and grinded everyone and everything. hahah.. i thought he was scary, but in that crazy funny kind of way. it was a different "vibe" there and the music was very nostalgic of middle school and they even played paperboy. hahah..niice :P the drive home was okay.. there were some parts where it was raining REALLY hard, and there was a crazy accident on the other side of the freeway, and lots of lightning. it sucked that i had to drive by myself and know that carol and sakura were right in the car behind me. but at least i wasn't completely alone right? :P

saturday was dvd recording day at my sisters and lunch with beth @ my new favorite place california chicken cafe... yumm!! we also vegged on trader joe's chocolate volcano cakes and the ice cream aisle at ralphs. hahah. driving home in the rain yet again... lighting, hard rain...yikes. sunday my mom tricked me into going to her religious group's chinese new year festival. she asked if my friends would want to come help.. good thing they all couldn't come. i got there and it wasn't too bad until this jerk of a lady came up and was like "why don't you stand over there.... umm..so you're not in the way." ugh.. i was there first, hello!! last time i try to help my mom. haha.. so i just sat around, reading my newspaper, looking at the little booths, trying to find ways to amuse myself, and finally i resorted to sleeping in the car. until my dad called asking where i was because i was supposed to pick him up at the airport!! oh CRAP. lucky that my dad is not the type to hold grudges. he took a taxi home because he didn't want to have to wait for us, but i still wanted to get home because i was afraid he didn't have house keys. i don't know what he did, but he was inside the house so i didn't feel TOO bad. and he came bearing gifts :P heheh. he bought me this cute wooden cookie molder thing for cookies or chocolate or something that is in the shape of a peanut butter cup but has a chicken carving on top. he bought a dragon one for my sister, but thought she probably wouldn't want it, so now i have both. who wants to have another baking party!? haha. that night i had a hot date with sakura to see the wedding date. heheh... i know i know.. chick flick movie crap.. but whatever. it was based on a girly book that nicole had actually lent me.. but i didn't connect the plots until i saw "based on.." in the credits. i wasn't as pleased as when i saw hitch... and the development in the movie wasn't good, which made the movie sort of unbelievable.. BUT, the movie stopped showing in the middle for a few minutes, and went back on, but because of that sakura and i got a refund.. so hey.. not too bad right? :) i was scared a first though.. like what if there was a blackout and that's why the movie stopped.. but no such thing and we were safe :)

monday... beth and i went to disneyland.. yay!!! i totally would have stayed home, but beth wants to make her passport "worth it" so she decided we were going "no matter what" despite the rain, thunder, flash flood warnings and killer mudslides, we went to disneyland. beth forgot her umbrella in the car and joined the drones and bought a bright blue poncho. i think she really loves it. she especially loved her poncho when we went on the grizzly rapids ride... twice. i got soaked.. and it was already nighttime.. i don't know why i agreed to go on it twice, i guess i figured it was already raining and wet outside.. what did it matter right? like swim meets and what not. beth and i met up at hook's pointe with nicole and had the yummers creme brulee. so addicting. we also got suckered into the chocolate souffle, which was a little dissapointing, but at least we had the creme brulee to make up for it :P

today.. was a day.. yikes. a lot lately.. i've been seeing the sunshine while still raining, so at least i got greeted by a rainbow this morning. BUT.. my car wouldn't start. boo... it started..and kind of wigged out and then died. and then refused to start. maybe it was mad with all the madness from friday. so i asked my mom to use her beast of a minivan. she was hesitant, but just handed me the keys and told me to be careful. which is surprisiing.. because before she would absolutely refuse to let me touch her car. but i guess she knew it was important. or that i'm a great driver!! but i do feel bad that i dumped my car problems on my parents. my mom wanted to do stuff today, but she probably just wanted to fix it asap... so my dad took a few hours off to go back home and get it all checked out. boo for car problems, yay for my parents.

oh dammit. i've been trying to hide something, and i thought it was hidden really well. but i just found out a way that it could have been found, and i wonder if it's been found or am i safe. that's why it's not good to keep secrets.. but sometimes you just have to. the truth will set you free huh? or i wonder if it just causes more trouble. i guess not that it really matters or changes anything.. but it's scary not to know what exactly is protected and what's not.

oh HALLELUJAH... i got outbid. PHEW!!!

i guess all those wishes on time, tunnels and the cave of wonders helped :)

thank you thank you thank you.

i've got 13 minutes to write this post.. good thing i type fast. hopefully i can think as fast as i type :P

anyhoo.. it's been a good day.. it started out kind of dreary.. i felt pretty blah this morning. i changed into three different outfits and was dissatisfied with them all, but ended up with the first outfit i put on.. dumb. and i decided to take a different way to work thinking that it might be faster because it's certainly quicker getting home. i may have been faster.. i'm not quite sure.. but i didn't like that nervous feeling transferring from the 405 to the 105 and all the massive traffic... that was the most nervewracking.. oh and when sepulveda turned into lincoln. ack.

anyhoo.. today as ended being pretty good. i booked a ticket to go visit angelee after she moves into her phat (did i just spell it with a ph..??) townhouse :) and i got an email saying that me new ram for my computer has "arrived" yay :) not that my computer is slow, but in anticipation for final cut :) awesome! aaaand.. my mom was bugging me about benefits and junk because my "student" coverage is expiring or something because i guess that they figured out that i'm not legally a student anymore. so i called HR and found out what companies we use to see when and "if" i cross over to staff is it easier if i sign up for the same one. well.. i won't bore you with boring details.... BUT she informed me that i have already become staff YAY... i was like "really?" hahaha.. and she's like "your boss didn't tell you?" obviously not because i was surprised. haha.. but it was a nice surprise. :) so as of monday of last week i am "staff" hahah. i get can have direct deposit (ooOoO) and my benefits don't kick in until a little bit later.. but at least i know they are coming. yay i can finally get new glasses! :P AND.. i also get my holidays paid!! whoooo!! when i asked my boss about it he said that he had submitted it so that i could get this coming monday paid. AWESOME. i don't think i've ever not worked before and still got paid. sure it is a simple concept - but it's so "exciting" haha. so.. funny funny.. when i wrote in my blog and whined about becoming staff soon.. i was already staff. har har har. :P yay. :) and now if i take that day off to go play with angelee i may not feel so guilty about it.. i wonder how vacation and all that junk work :P (i know.. premature considering i just got it.. but think of it as "planning")

yaaaaaay... i feel almost worthwhile now :P almost like a "real grownup" hahah.

okay time to go and go to one of my other jobs (hah). adios!!

i hate that if i leave my house at 7:30am then i will get here around 8am. but if i leave my house at 7:40am or 7:36ish even, that i get here right before 8:30. seriously.. what the heck? i mean.. i "understand" why.. but i don't get it... in the sense that i don't want to understand.. because it shouldn't make sense... but it does. stupid.

last night i had to work and when i got home i was "planning" on going to bed right away. of course my plans to go to bed at a decent hour never pan out the way i want them to. my mom had me burn some of my sister's news and wedding dvd's for our relatives, and those take awhile.. finally at 1:30am i deciding to give up and continue them another day. i was so beat that i just went sleep. my mom woke me up later.. and i was SO tired.. but she kept yelling at me and i thought she wanted me to get out of bed and go to work. so finally i got out of bed and but then i realized she wanted me to take out my contacts. sure.. i know i know.. i'm supposed to take them out everyday. but i've started to become more and more lazy about it and sometime i just sleep with them in, which i'm not supposed to do because it dehydraes my eyes, and i could scratch my cornea (which i think i've done before) and some other awful stuff, but hell i do it anyways because it's one less thing to do in the morning. awful right? so my mom hoisted me out of bed at like 2:30am.. and i was SO cranky. i am so not a morning person.. or a wake up when i'm sleeping person. but waking up this morning was not much better.. i am ti-red.

i feel like i have to let a lot of little things go. that not everything is going to go my way, and i just have to suck it up and deal with it. but i don't want to become (or continue being) the person to who lets so much go that you end up being walked all over. i mean... what are little things and what are dealbreakers? or if there are too many little things too many times, does that equal on big thing to not be happy with? or does that count as one little thing that you can't control and just simply deal with? i don't want to be the kind of person that no one can deal with because i have to have everything my way. i also don't want to be constantly worrying about making other people happy, or constantly stressed out that i'm not doing everything how everyone else wants it. people want to hang out with other people that are "fun" but if you worry so much about "being fun" then it's not fun anymore. just like constantly trying to "be cool".. there's a point where you're trying to hard and you're so not it. my dad told me once that if i don't learn to forgive people then i'll be miserable. but does forgiveness equal forgetting, or does it just mean you're over it and you won't be that way again. i'm far too nostalgic and wussy at this point to just say "eff you" and just leave people in the dark.. sometimes i wish i could be that kind of person, and then sometimes i'm glad i'm not a fatty jerk.. but i hate feeling like such a sucker sometimes.

argggh.. i also hate how i don't have enough time in the day. i want to do too many things.. but they all pile on top of each other. my work wants me to work this "team israel vs. team mexico" game tonight which is "huge" or so they say. and that could be kind of exciting right? just like real life mighty ducks.. hehhe. but i have to go buy some stuff for my friend's bday and the place closes @ 9pm.. and i was supposed to buy it tonight to give to someone tomorrow.. but i'm trying to see if it can wait until later, but i was supposed to go to my sisters and record some dvd's for her.. and i'm also supposed to hang out with my mom and do some other junk and then.. arrrggh. i wish my work days weren't so long.. i can never get anything done. especially with time constraints of stores closing and gotta be there at whatever time.. blah blah blah.. and it's ridiculous that i get sad whenever i can't do "everything" i feel like i'm missing out or something .. when i have a million other things to do. lame. :P i do want to go to disneyland relatively soon.. can we go sometime? soon please? i'd go by myself, but that's kind of no fun. hmm.. what else do i want to do :P

so we get a lot of random calls here that "i'm not supposed to let through" at first i was kind of iffy, but now i just kind of whatever. i just got a call from a "very interested high profile important Brazilian investor" who was interested in the company. does that sound fake to me? kind of .. like one of those chain letters, but in actual real life. could it maybe have been true? maybe, but we get lots of faxes "sell us your company?!" i don't know... are these people really interested in selling? i don't think so.. but who knows. maybe this was "the guy" but at the same time i'm not supposed to let you in.. so... yea.

strange.

i'm tired... i just really want to sleep right now. it's another day where i wish i had 2 more hours instead of 4 (isn't that everyday?)

i spent a little bit of stalking.. not for cute boys, but just random people. it's interesting to read other people's blogs that you kind of know, but not really... and then you feel like you know them so well... but you hardly or may not even talk to them at all, they may not even know you exist, but yet you know all about them. it almost makes them a celebrity of some sort, but they're not, so it's weird. before i was really good friends with nicole i still used to read her blog all the time (i've told her this before, so hopefully she won't get too freaked out by it) so i felt like i "knew" her before i really knew her. hahah. i think the same with pete too. when he was the exaulted trustee we used to stalk him on his page.. and then we realized he could track who was looking at his site and i figured i might as well fess up and start talking to him. maybe that's something i should be regretting :P jk.

it's also weird because when you read stuff of people's you assume you know what they're talking about, or who they're writing to, and it could be a totally different situation. stuff gets totally misconstrued in print, especially when you're trying to be all sly and vague. or, sometimes it's painfully obvious what stuff is about, but you think you're being all sly and no one can figure it out... but oh.. people can. i dunno.. i was just reading a lot of different people's stuff.. and sometimes i wonder who's reading mine. obviously the people who are leaving comments or say to me "so in your blog" blah blah blah whatever.. but yea.. it's weird because you would think "why would you read blogs of people you don't know" maybe you know them, but not too well, or you know of them.. it's interesting though.

i also think that it's funny that all lot of people whine or complain (myself included i realize) about a lot of stuff, but i wonder if they really mean it. or do they just say it because they can, because they can whine without anyone saying anything. people write about their unhappiness in their life, how they're lonely, how no one cares for them, what they wish other people would do, or what things would happen. and you think people are so together, but then they write about how miserable their life is. you almost don't believe it. or you know that people write about how great their life is, but really it's just a big waste of space.

they had this thing on kevin & bean once about weblogs and why people have them... and i dont' quite remember people's answer, but i always wonder if i were to call up what would i say. because i want to keep in touch with my friends? because i like having an audience? because i like being able to complain without someone talking back? because it gives me something to do at work? because i talk a lot and this is just one more place that i can do it? because all of my friends do? because it makes me feel special? and then when people leave comments is that like having an actual conversation?

i don't know where this is going aymore... i'm just rambling.. that is also another freedom my blogger allows me. :)

three and a half hours to go.....

i just bought tickets to the teeny bopperest concert EVER. i know i know.. i totally got suckered in. i was watching one tree hill (yes..i know), and they had all the acts singing on the show (which basically is just a hour long commercial for this tour) and i was like "wow, i really like all of them" and afterwards they had a commercial to "follow the tour LIVE!!!" so.. like the teeny bopper sucker i am i immediately went to go check if there were tickets and crossing my fingers hoping they weren't sold out. they're playing at the wiltern, which i immediately confused with the troubador or roxy or something smaller.. but i remembered that the wiltern is friggin huge..and it will be filled with 13 year old girls screaming. argh. but i have come to like tyler hilton, gavin degraw and i've always liked michelle branch... and what i saw on the show was really good.. so here's to hoping!! i've been spending way too much money on concerts.. :P

but despite my self-realization of lameness.. i am still kind of excited :)

i know i know... half you have disowned me already. sorry.

jean: there should be a valentine's equivalent of mistletoe
nicole: there is, chocolate, and you eat it ALL BY YOURSELF.

hahahahah..
happy valentine's day!!

you know.. i really am kind of okay with valentine's day. and i think because not only have i had 22 valentine's day by myself, i've never experienced that lovey dovey mushy crap on feb 14th, so there's nothing to miss. it's kind of like "whatever." although i did get a little bummed with all the flowers being delivered this morning to girls that weren't me, and valentine's day packages from home that i wasn't getting (despite the fact that i live at home.. but still). valentine's day balloons, balloons, heart shaped cookies, heart shaped cookies on sticks stuck in flower pots and arranged like flowers.. arggh!! to much!! it was mostly the flowers that i was like "aww... i want a delivery of flowers to come to me." who from.. i haven't the foggiest.. but yea. all the times i've been delivered flowers (like 2.. for my birthday, from my family).. i haven't been around, so i show up and flowers are there. which is great, but someday.. i will experience the excitement of receiving flowers - and it won't be a joke from some girlfriends :P i miss when you had your class list and you spent the week making your valentine's day mailbox, and everyone would pass out valentines, drop them in your mailbox and you'd have a party drinking punch, and little debbie cakes (one of the kids in my class's dad worked at little debbie, so every holiday we'd have those little cakes :P) and check out all your valentines. funny enough i'm pretty sure i still have some of them tucked away in my drawer somewhere. :)

but i have lots of love.. so i don't mind.. but presents are always nice :P i was going to make cookies or something or buy candy, but i was too lazy.. so oh well. my dad is out of town, so it's just me and my mom.. so we're each other's dates :P i was going to take her out, but i have a feeling we'll just be bumming it at home. yay for sweats! :)

this weekend was fun.. but definitely not long enough!! friday i said goodbye to my relatives and consequently missed the hockey game. oh well. i was going to go out to see a movie, but my mom pulled the whole "i'm lonely!! don't you want to hang out with me?!" oh geez. saturday i woke up late anticipating a fun lazy day, but i got asked to cover a shift at el gap-o. i am too much of a sucker to say no, so that's where i found myself. afterwards was in-n-out and the make-up movie from friday.. hitch!! beth and ryan made fun of me for wanting to see it (and/or the wedding date).. but really it was really good!! really funny!! i laughed so hard.. and it's not super cheesy or predictable, but really cute :) and funny. oh my gosh it was so funny! sunday i played catch up watching tv at my sister's house... jerry's mom is deaf!! oh my gosh. hahah.. he is so cute, and his mom is deaf, he's almost perfect!! i think that jen is totally going to pick him.. she's had the hots for him from day 1!

working at the gap is evil. i worked a four hour shift and then bought 2 items of clothing that probably equaled more than i made that shift. awful!! and SPEAKING of awful... i got a summary of my spendings from my credit card company.. i spent $12,000 last year! what do i have to spend $12,000 on?! why didn't i save it?! my high spending month was february.. weird huh. i thought christmas would be way higher. but $8,000 of it was on "retail".. basically stuff i DON'T NEED. and $2,000 on food, which is not as bad.. but still not good. seriously.. if i could have saved half of that.. i would be so much happier.. maybe :P i have shelves full of dvd's that i don't watch everyday.. i figure they'll come in handy when i have my own place and a nifty video library :P but still... $8,000 on clothes? electronics? media? seriously? take away my credit card!

happy birthday keri & norma!!
valentine's day babies :)

luc totally lied.. it only took me like 30 minutes to get home. there were no accidents on the 405 .. good thing i didn't listen to him :P

"that's too late!! you have to hurry and make your move.. before he finds a right handed woman who won't appreciate him and love him the way you will"