&*^%#^@)&!!

remember the incident with the worst chiropractic office EVER!!? well they are back. little things, but not stuff i wanted them to add on their long list of assholeness.

my lawyers called me today saying that dr. irvine's staff, specifically gabby, won't release my papers and the medical statement because they're "too understaffed" to get the paperwork together to send over to my lawyer's office. seriously? it takes you that much effort to fax over some paperwork that between 3 people you can't do it? you must be incompetent. but we already knew that. so my lawyer says we have to pay a copy service to go over to hermosa (my lawyer's offices are located in alhambra) and pick up the papers so they can make copies of them. furthermore, we have to pay dr. irvine's office FIFTEEN DOLLARS to prepare the paperwork to be picked up. seriously?! i have to pay you $15 to pull a file out of a drawer?!! i know $15 isn't a whole lot of money, but it's the principle here people. i mean.. if they said they were charging us $15 to send my lawyer's the copies.. i'd grumble a little bit, but i wouldn't be this outraged. granted.. maybe my paper work isn't all in one file (because they suck ass) and maybe they have to do some work to put it together.. but that's not my fault they aren't organized? everyone i know says "how hard is it to get some paperwork, push print, or copy?" my second chiropractor (who is awesome by the way - kyle schleicher on wilshire & 7th - 310.395.7535) has one assistant, ONE, and he managed to get the paperwork through. they're totally being spiteful bitches. i can't believe that's how they run their company. i'm going to call tomorrow and see what they say if i want to pick up my own files.. they'll want to charge me too.. this initimidating looking biker like man (but totally nice) offered to go pick up my paper work (and i wanted to add rough em up a little bit) - but i don't want to have to resort to that. i don't know.. i hate this crap, i hate them, why can't they just get over the fact that i left because they suck ass and give me my paperwork, why must they be total shitheads. UGH.

went to the premiere of see this movie with john cho and seth meyers :) i like them both. i didn't loooove the movie, but it was enjoyable and amusing. it has it's definite funny moments and it's a good time, so go see it to watch a not horrible film and something that's not the usual norm. it's in limited release so go and try and see it if you can. you may not want to try something that's not a "hit" ... sooooo... if that's not your thing definitely go see annapolis directed by justin lin!! :) whooo. it seems like a military movie.. but it actually a boxing story.. (i know it's not that easy to tell from the traiilers) but i hear it's good stuff.. AND james franco is hot :P

speaking of boxing i just got home from a contender fight. it was surprisingly exciting. i've never really watched boxing before (actual boxing.. cinderella man doesn't count) and i was kind of nervous about it being to gory or violent.. but it's actually pretty thrilling :) because it's not just "fighting" you know.. there's skill and purpose and strategy, rules, point system.. it's pretty interesting. and it's a lot of fun being in the arena and seeing the cameras (i'm such a production goober). it's like all athletic events - you cheer for "your guy" and "my guy" won :) so it was good times. i'm glad i was with someone who LOVES boxing because it makes me that much more excited - because otherwise i just feel like the girl who is yelling out things that she doesn't really understand or make sense. haha. i was that anyways.. but i feel a little more legitimate sitting next to someone who actually knows what they're saying :)



i also spent a lot of this weekend shooting the short traffic in the sky. it's fun and engaging. i'm really glad i'm doing it even though it's eating up a lot of time.. it's temporary though.. and worth it. it's a little strange and me and charles are working together on this film after so long of not really keeping in touch after middle school. neat really, but it intrigues both of us. that makes me happy too. i guess that's all i'm going to say about that.

man.. i totally just teared up watching grey's anatomy.... i like good tv.

happy chinese new year!

my fav conversation for tonight:

nicole: yea i was in a hit and run accident
me: aww.. are you okay?
nicole: yea.. and umm. your christmas present was in my trunk
me: god nicole! why can't you be more careful??!!

haha.. of course that was in jest. we spent a good 3 minutes laughing while i cried over my lost crumpled christmas present. haha. it sounds silly when i type it out, but i swear it was funny :P

side note:
.. i need to get back on the bandwagon ...

we just got back from screenings a little while ago and while i'm waiting to shower, i thought i'd blog - because i'm obsessed. i wish i could post all the pictures of the picturesque scenery (yay for snow) but i didn't bring my cable, so it'll just have to wait. we saw three movies today - and it was kind of a lot.. only because i had so little sleep and it's it was in the span of 8 hours. and then add in trying to eat and travel time.. not much room for leisure.. but it's all a good time. we spent the later part of the afternoon/evening in salt lake because that's where our screenings were. tomorrow is our park city day.. so it's nice to get to see both because i didn't get to last time.

i'm going to "try" to get up early enough to go into park city for a screening (emphasis on the word try) and right now it's setting in just how tired i am.. and i have a long day ahead. you think i can wake up at 6am? (it's one hour ahead too.. so it's actually 3:45am)

small summary for today (yesterday) - not previously mentioned

*park city to pick up tickets and eat a little lunch (who knew utah would have decent japanese food).. although i am SUPER sad that my favorite 24 hangout place rUinTAH eggs was not there anymore. BOO! it was always so crowded - i wonder what happened.. maybe it only thrived during sundance times.

*hotel check in - funny fiascos and had to switch rooms 3 times, which is funny only to me because i just saw the episode of friends where monica and chandler go on a weekend getaway (when they were still hiding their relationship) and she made chandler switch rooms like 10 times.

*drive back to salt lake to catch the 3 screenings: friends with money, factotum & lucky number slevin

*dinner at red rock brewing co... (waiting, bar seats, ordering, leaving, to go....) if that doesn't make sense to you it's really just a note to myself.

*midnight screening of lucky number slevin in a small quaint theatre - my favorite out of the three.

*driving back to the hotel from salt lake - at one point the car thermostat said it 6 degrees farenheit outside. holy cow.. brr! good thing the heater was way up :)

k.. i should go prep for my supposed early day tomorrow.. we'll see if it happens.. but regardless it will be long.

having a blast - wish you were here.

Sundance #1:

Yay!! We’re here. We’re driving in the car to park city from salt lake. The flight here, though early, wasn’t too bad. We couldn’t get a direct flight so even before the butt crack of dawn my dad drove sakura, beth and I to the airport (thanks daddy!) where we met up with Shelby. Gosh a little mc donald’s hash browns (yum!) and waited to board.

(IT’S SNOWING!!)

we had an hour layover in vegas where I was surprised to see how close the strip to the airport – and excited to see they had slot machines in the airport.. haha.. and we followed sakura’s “hunch” and “feelings” to a certain section and after ups and downs I finally won $16!! Whoo!! I know.. small winnings, but it was a exciting start.

we’re driving into park city and going to pick up our tickets, get some food (starving!!), check into our hotel and then off to our first screening!! I want to pack so much stuff in… snowboarding, screenings, seeing the sights, parties, eating :P – but we’re only here for two days. It’s okay.. like all the websites say.. it doesn’t matter much what we do because we’re at sundance and “being at sundance rules all”

haha.. oh.. celebrity alert #1… rider strong (shawn from boy meets world) was on our plane. Beth saw him waiting at the airport but didn’t say anything because she thinks it’s rude… not that I wanted to harass him but I like to sit in my own little pool of giddiness. i’d like to think that I keep the obvious gawking and gaping to a minimum. I saw him while boarding the plane and later reveled with other passengers about the “celebrity” on our plane.. haha.. we’re such nerds…

i have never been so happy that i get off at 7 in my life. i got let our early today because there was a massive power outage... and i was driving home at 5:30.... SO MUCH EFFIN TRAFFIC. ugh. and stupid drivers. it took me damn near 30 minutes to get home. but enough about that.. i need to go pack! and then i have a mtg at 8 in torrance. if i don't finish packing now, i'm going to have to come back to LA to pack after the meeting and then back to torrance to spend the night. and that right there is just impractical. grr... so little time. and i'm procrastinating with my blog. typical :P

i'm so lame!!!

i think things are cool - but they're so not.. at least to everyone else.

i'm a worrywart - bordering on annoying. i worry too much about everything - but i already knew this. i worry if i'm annoying you right now.

i'm a good girl - good bordering on boring.

i'm too nice and helpful - i see things and i want to fix them. i want to make things better. i want to help. help bordering on overbearing. it's like in joy luck club where the mom takes the rotten crab and everyone else gets the best crabs. hah.. i know where i got this from.

i am lame... bordering on pathetic.

but not quite there yet... right?

i'm a dork - but yet hopefully still kind of rad.

on tap: meet the barkers

thank you thank you linh for the awesome belated christmas present!! i laughed with giddyness just because the present was so hilarious. i have had this long standing infatuation with "he's just not that into you".. so i get the book AND the calendar. hi-larious. now i can have a daily reminder about how guys aren't that into me. haha...

this totally trips me out...

jake: week one

jake: week sixteen

they grow so fast, you don't even know. and this is all on milk only! crazy!

ps. i bought that onesie he's wearing in the second picture.. so cute.. i have good taste :P

*SHORTS*

*i'm soooo tired today.. stayed up way too late talking on the phone. it was a great conversation, and i knew it was going to happen, because whenever i call her we spend FOREVER on the phone, but it still makes me uber tired nonetheless.

*i'm kind of wheezey this morning, which i do not like. i was sitting on the ice rink for far too long, with way too little clothing. no.. not skanked out, but i was wearing a skirt and flip flops, which is not great for icy coldness. but i had no choice i came straight from other work & the airport - no time to put on my uber warm clothing.

*i was at the airport because i was dropping my sister and jake off :( (jeff-gu went earlier in another car).. as usual my family loves to run behind schedule when catching flights. haha. it was also a rush because i had to be at work earlier than i had originally anticipated. but while i am glad that i get to be by myself again (in preparation for moving out) - i am sad that they left and there's no more cutie-patootie nephew to play with, no more sister to eat good food and watch days and reality tv with, and no more jeff-gu to play mario party with. good thing it's not 6 months this time.

*when i was leaving i saw this guy loading these giant bags of equipment in tampa bay lighting bags into a locker room. he was looking at me kind of funny, like i was going to maul him and steal the equipment or something. haha. whatever.. what would i want to do with gross, smelly, sweaty hockey junk? oh.. ebay.. that's right. but anyways.. i realize now that he was storing the player's equipment after their game last night. kind of neat.. i'm such a starstruck floozy. and that's so weird too because i'm so close to it all, but really if any of the kings or lightning players or even lakers (aside from kobe, of course) were walking around.. i wouldn't be able to recognize them to save my life. okay maybe the lakers.. cuz i'd be like.. "really tall black dude.. must be a laker" oh.. and luke walton.. cuz he's cute :P

*i had a chance to go on a movie set, which i was super excited about - but then i didn't end up getting to go, which i am kind of bummed about. oh well, next time right? but it was neat hearing about it, and inspiring to hear this person talk about fighting the fight and how all the hard work paid off. hopefully sundance will be equally as inspiring (if i can get into screenings!) and a good energy for everything. but i'm working on a short.. so even if my professional life can't be about that, at least i'm doing something - that's a start.

*it's harder to myspace or blog at work when the part-timer is here with me because she can automatically see onto my screen :P i feel a little guilty when she turns around and there's a ton of pictures from myspace on my screen .. but i just turned around and she's on ebay.. so i'm sure she doesn't really give a hoot.

*yay!! sundance!!!

*i bought boots for this weekend. i call them my fuggs.. (for fake uggs).. because really.. all shearling boots are essentially modeled after the ugg popularity. but i love my fuggs, they're super warm.. and i love it that i can just tromp around in the snow as i please :) and not worry that i spent $130 on a pair of boots that i will either ultimately a)ruin or b)wear once in cold weather and never again because i'm not pretentious enough to pretend that it's cold enough in LA to wear them

*the plan is to move out soon.. but i'm facing this dilemma about living by myself vs. living with strangers. not really a fan of either.. so.. anyone looking for a place to live or need a roomie? :P

*okay.. so too many shorts = a long.. but oh well. still wheezey, maybe i'll run to get some coffee later. gotta read up on some SAG contracts, and organize my itinerary for this weekend.. whoo hoo! oh yea.. and work :P

*best line i've heard lately: "you can't just go out there and be too michelle kwan..."

<3

i've been watching far too much MTV for my own good.

i am totally obsessed with the show NEXT. it's such a guilty pleasure ... i know it's the worst show ever.. but it's so interesting and demeaning all at the same time. when people get instantly NEXTed.. that's so wrong. hahahaha.. the epitome of superficialness is this show.. which is so funny because i saw a casting ad for it on craigslist and it's like "hot hot hot" but i swear that there are so many people on that show that are not remotely hot... odd. but if you want to have 5 minutes of fame... here ya go.

i also caught up on "there and back" the new series about ashley parker angel and him trying to make it as a solo artist post o-town. i am a reality junkie, and i will forever *heart* boy bands - so this is almost my dream come true yah know? hahah.. jk. but seriously.. there was this shot of the pipes of a gas co. or something.. it looked familiar you know the manhattan beach area, and then they went to the lighthouse cafe to hang out for a bit... ashley angel lives near me!! hahah.. but it was so cute, it was his and his girlfriend's two year anniversary so they had a picnic on the beach, he made her this giant card with all these pictures, and serenaded her with this really cute song he wrote and played guitar and sang on the beach, at sunset... so cute.. i'm a total sucker for boys with guitars.. but that's not new.

room raiders texas.. here i come... oh my.. and i have a meeting tomorrow morning.. oh.. i mean this weekend. yay 3 day weekend!

Something strange is happenin' lately
We no longer see eye to eye
Time has changed us, rearranged us
And it leaves me wondering why

Now everything is different
Nothing feels quite the same
All the things we liked
About each other have changed
I don't know about the things that you do
What happened to the person
That I thought I knew?

You go one way and I'll go another
When nothing seems to work
Then why should we bother
We've let these little differences
Tear us apart
They're breaking up our friendship
And their breaking my heart
You need me and I need you
If only together we could see this through

You go left
And I'll go right
Life is just one crazy battle
When we argue, fuss, and fight
You're like day
Oh, and I'm like night
But if we could get together
Maybe things could work out right

I can see so much in you
Why can't we just see this through
Why must everything
In this life be so compllicated
But through all this pain
It's not you I blame
Why can't you feel the same

You're like day
And I'm like night
But if we could get together
Maybe things could work out right

You go left
And I'll go right
Life is just one crazy battle
When we argue, fuss, and fight
You're like day
Oh, and I'm like night
But if we could get together
Maybe things could work out right

We'll try to make it alright now
We'll try to make it alright now

~Save Ferris, Little Differences

today is my day of perpetual lateness. an off kilter day... maybe in preparation for friday the 13th huh? which is actually now.. but i guess in that sense that means i'm early huh? :P

today i slept in and woke up when i was supposed to already be at work... but i paid for it.. because i start running around like a maniac pretty quickly after i got there. as soon as i got back to my desk i'd have to run all around all over again. i got back to my desk around noon or so and i was absolutely poop-ed. it was so weird, because it was just a few steps right? a couple of door, crossing the street, stairs... man i'm such a wuss. but in my defense, it also didn't help that i wasn't really wearing the best walking shoes (aka high heels). haha.. lunch was good though.. el tarasco.. YUM. i *heart* el tarasco and heart carnitas. i had a tough time deciding between carne asada and carnitas. i know my day is filled with so many tough decisions. :P

after work i crammed down my leftovers from lunch and figured that i had enough time to go make some (or many) returns at target. that was nice.. i like getting money back :) there were a few things wrong.. but for the most part it was okay. i can fix them later i suppose. i hate this whole "time limit" thing on returns. i mean.. i'm fine with getting store credit if it's been too long, but not being able to return it at all? that sucks. anyways.. i sauntered off to work #2 thinking everything was okay.. and then i get this text message "no scorekeeping today?" and it strikes me a little odd. i see a game going on on the NHL rink and i panic a little bit because i think the game on the NHL rink and the olympic rink start at the same time. i breathe a little bit easier when i find out that the olympic game rink doesn't start until 9:15, which is the time i'm supposed to be at work..... or am i? i hear that they had some trouble with the scorekeeper on the NHL rink and that that person wasn't there at 8:45 when the game started.. and the guy who's supposed to do the 9:15 game is covering. uhh.. who's supposed to be on the NHL rink.. oh right.. that's me. OOPS. what was i doing? taking my sweet time at target. hah. man oh man.. i'm sorry.. i felt pretty bad - but i honestly thought i was supposed to work the 9:15 game. perpetual lateness i tell you.

hopefully this means my friday the 13th won't be all helter skelter because i've gotten all the kookyness out. hopefully today wasn't a preview.. because i don't think i want to deal with it.

ps. people are jackasses.

first of all - i didn't get a chance to blog..

happy birthday jill! (two days late)

i feel like blogging - and so i am. i actually really wanted to blog earlier today, but i couldn't get around to it today at work. i was busy.. well not every second of the day, but not really a long enough perioud where i got a chance to do my blog justice. go figure .. i was actually busy at work huh... too busy at work to blog.. that's a change :P i was going through some roller coaster emotions this week. and i don't know if it's a chemical imbalance, a situation thing.. but it's better tonight. :) yay. i was questioning my work a little bit this week, but i got some good advice and today was a better day (versus tuesday.. but it's always hard coming back after a vacation).. so it made it not so bad. plus.. fridays always make things better right?

tonight i also got to hang out with kimmy! i love that girl. she's so pretty and perfect that it makes me want to hate her - but you just can't. i didn't get to hang out with her much because she lived in temple city and then burbank and no one ever wants to drive out there.. but NOW she lives 5 minutes away from my sister. whoo!! she lives in a beautiful aparment with a cool roommate - which makes me want to hate her more.. but i can't. i love hanging out with her.. she fed me and then we went to go get diddy riese, and then came back, chatted, laughed at people on myspace, watched tivo, and built bathroom shelves. man.. i really want to have a place of my own. i'm at an impasse.. i don't want to live with a stranger, i don't want to live alone, but i only want to live in certain areas... but it can't be perfect. so *sigh* i don't know what to do.. but march is my new deadline. i'll be housesitting again for my sister and the new (old) gig ends in march (again) - so that's my new timeline. i probably shouldn't say it because i don't want to jinx it - but that's the plan my friends. aside from all the fun of living on your own, i really think i need to do it to "grow up".. you know what i mean jellybeans? i think i always knew that - but i was always worried about offending my parents... at this point.. i don't care. i think lately it's been the final straws to cause me to worry a little less about that. someone asked me today about an available place in downey.. but i don't think that i'm quite that desperate. downey.. seriously? hell.no.

anyways.. tomorrow (today) i'm going to a birthday party with a lot of people i haven't seen in a long long time.. it'll be.. interesting. haha. and then working hockey this weekend. i hope it'll be "worth it".. hahaha.

stuff that i need to do:
*research sundance shows
*organize receipts and return stuff
*try to organize ipod stuff?
*figure out which pictures i want to print

i'm sure there is tons more, but this is my list for now.

oh yea.. happy 2006.. it's the first weekend and it was 85 degrees today when i was out and about for lunch. i LOVE it. i love that it's january and sunny and so summer like. whooooo.

SO.BORED.

this is me... at work... :
i can't really complain, i'm getting paid to not really do anything.. hang out, blog, myspace, look up crap on the internet. whoo crap! it's really quiet though because so many people are on vacation. but i am not, and i am just sitting here. maybe since i have a new cube i could crawl under my desk and take a nap and less people would notice... but then i would be under my desk. ew. haha.

this week has been a week of meeting up with old friends. i guess that's how it is when people come home for the holidays. last night was middle school friends, tonight is high school friends. good times. maybe in a few years i'll meet up with old college friends, because right now we're not really keeping in touch much. some of them.. but not all. i'd post pictures, but i don't have the really recent ones and i'm a little too lazy right now. you'd think the boredom would want to give me something to do, but in turn it just makes me tired and lazy. hahah.. i've been watching a lot of days :) but only the carrie/austin/sami/lucas storyline. i fast forward through everything else (i <3 tivo) but yet still manage to keep up on what's going on because it's so slow! and you just can tell by facial expressions. haha. austin=hot, but they're all still so dumb. i can't believe they talk to sami, or drag their feet on telling they like each other.. stupid stupid stupid. so frustrating!! but i'm still so addicted! i've also been playing mario party 7 .. whoo!! not a whole lot.. but i did stay up until 1am on tuesday morning playing it.. so fun. :) - but that was only my second time.. and i haven't played since then, so i'm not totally hooked... yet.

ooh yay.. i might have lunch with my mom and j^3 (the nickname for joan, jeff & jake... lazyness sets in and that family is reduced to a symbol.. like prince). hahah. that'll keep me from falling asleep... i did bring lunch though.. leftovers from dinner last night at el pollo inka... yuuuuum..

i'm going to sundance :) i booked the hotel and flight and car yesterday. yay!! i thought the plans were going to fall through, but they didn't.. :) if i can get a few more of my friends to come along with it'll be SO fun.. hopefully they'll say yes!! i realized that it's only in a few weeks too.. crazyness!!

anyone have good plans for new years? umm.. i mean.. good plans that i can crash? haahah. i'm not that great at planning good outings.. sometimes they come together, but a lot of the time with big holidays everyone has their own idea of what they want so it's hard to get everyone together. birthdays are easy because you plan what you want and everyone has to go along with it because you say so.. haha.. i might just end up babysitting so other people can go out and party. is that lame? hahah...

yay! going out to lunch.. indian food? i hope i like it.. i usually don't.. the spices are too different for me..

today's lunch: http://shershahcuisineofindia.com/

technology is so ridiculously convenient these days.. i love it!!

iSighting is awesome.

:)

up late again. working on captioning pictures cuz now i can't do it at work! at least not this week when i'm training.

so i think i need to cut back on the sarcasm, because either i'm too good at it, too bad at it, or people just don't get me. apparently there are certain people who think i have a HUGE attitude problem because they can't tell when i'm serious and when i'm not. assuming the whole time i'm serious (am i ever? jk) i say a lot of really mean things. things that i think it's obvious that i'm joking... what kind of person says those things in person? either someone really blunt, or someone with a big problem. supposedly that someone equals me. right. apparently i am someone that needs to put other people down to make myself feel better. thanks for the memo. so i'll TRY to be "nicer" .. which i think is ridiculous because i am TOO nice sometimes.. and i usually only joke around with people i really like, apparently they don't like me back. maybe i should just talk less total... don't say anything at all.

but.. so i need to try and watch myself. not be sarcastic, especially around people who don't "know" me.. my very incorrect assumption is that people "get me" but i guess not. or i will follow every sarcastic phrase with "that was a joke"... how suave is that?

seriously.. people suck sometimes... maybe a lot of the time.

that was not a joke.

i really should be sleeping, but i'm not. hmm. how many posts have i started out writing that? too many probably.

i start my new job tomorrow. it's new, but yet i'm going to the same place, so it seems not new. does that seem weird? i don't even have a different parking space, well not this week. but i do get to go in at 9am instead of 8:30... does the 30 minutes make that huge of a difference? apparently so because i am staying up late because of it :P i also blame the 2 hour nap i took while i was at home. hopefully it'll add up the the next few hours of sleep i get and when i wake up i will be okay. it's weird to think that i won't have forever to the just surf the internet, blog, chat and myspace it up while at work. i mean.. granted a lot of people do anyways, but for me it was a given, because really i was just supposed to sit and wait for the phone to ring, or someone to walk through the door. granted i did other things, but most days ... well you get it. i have this plan i want to enact that probably takes lot of internet research, and i just had this dilemma that i wouldn't be able to do it tomorrow... hahaha.

i have a little hesitation calling this job a "promotion." only because it's not like they called me in and said they were giving me this new job. it was a process where i had to "apply".. and it was because it was vacated. but i guess in the real world higher title + pay raise = promotion no matter what the circumstances :P so i guess that's what it is.. but i still like to say "new job," but that does sound weird to me to.

i've been listening to a lot of cover songs lately.. well the two on my computer... on repeat :P a kelly clarkson - since u been gone cover by h's between vowels (a band discovered on myspace with former members of ozma in it..) and a coldplay cover of yellow by petra haden and bill frisell as featured on the OC. i really really like them.. granted.. i like the songs in original form... but they're very soothing for me. weird huh.

speaking of the OC.. i know you probably didn't think i watched it, but i have started to get into to it more and more. i blame mana and my sister. not so much my sister because even when she made me record those dvd's for her, i got into it a little, but still kicked the habit. but i watched the OC a little because mana was talking about it, and now i'm a little hooked... i want to know what happens with johnny and marissa, and i really like summer. okay okay. i'll stop gushing.. but having it on tivo helps because i can watch it when there's nothing better to do. it's not a religious thursday night ritual, so i'm not that far gone yet. another show i have been obsessed with lately is days of our lives. !!! hahah.. i haven't watched for awhile and a lot of things changed, BUT they brought back austin and THEN brought back carrie. MY FAVORITE PEOPLE EVAR. i know i sound really lame right now, but they were my favorites, they're the perfect couple, the reason why i will forever hate alison sweeney no matter what. it doesn't hurt that austin is like the hottest ever (even when he was in that Ross commercial... hahahha). i remember when me and angelee would sit on the phone together and just watch days of our lives. silent during the show with the occasional scream or gasp here and there, and the gab during commercials. when we were away at college sometimes i would tape the show and send it to her when she wasn't able to catch it. and i remember when austin accidentally hit sami with his car i was so deliriously happy i think i rewound and watched that moment 3 or 4 times. evil huh? that's how much we hate sami. but anyways.. it's slow and dragging and i love tivo for this reason as well. i fast forward through all the other story lines and just watch the austin/nicole/sami/carrie/lucas story line. funny enough even with the fast forwarding i can still comprehend the other story lines because it moves that slow. i haven't been keeping up on my passions though - i wonder what's going on with ethan/gwen/theresa? that was always my favorite storyline there.

i told myself i'd go to bed by 2am.. but now it's 2:07.. i should probably go. wish me luck in my first day... this week i will be training and hopefully i'll "get it" luckily, even though this girl is leaving, the girl who was in the position before her is still there so she will be getting a lot of my phone calls. hahaha. good thing she's also my friend.. she'll be getting a nice christmas present. haha.

i watched the chronicles of narnia today with my dad. funny.. he had been talking about it for weeks, and so i thought he really wanted to see it. my mom's not much of a movie person, so i have to be my dad's movie date or else i think he doesn't really watch many movies. which is fine because i don't really go out that much either. but it's funny because i think my dad bases how good movies will be based on how they do on the "hollywood stock exchange" (hsx.com) it's this thing my sister got us into awhile back where movies and actors are a stock and you can buy/trade etc etc and they make money. it's fake and fun and i stopped keeping up with it a LONG time ago, but my dad is still going strong. he told me that the narnia stock went up $20 today. haha... he never read the books though, that's why i wanted to see it. initially i wasn't interested, but i slowly came around. i think it was pretty good, definitely not a "kid's" movie, but young adult.. that's how the book is anyways right? my parents are also very funny in missing the "point" of movies. my dad was saying something like "see they should tell kids not to go hang out with strangers" when lucy first goes off with mr. thomas. and then after the movie was over my dad was like "this movie is not good because it teaches kids to run off, and also to fight" hahaha.. maybe not like that verbatim.. but that was his point. i said that they had to fulfill the prophecy and their fate, and he was just like "eh". hahahah.. next weekend i think we have a date to see aeon flux :) smiley face because that's the movie my company worked on.. yay!! i've heard conflicting things about the movie, and not like we make more money based on how the movie did, but i'm still interested. i'm sure my dad just wants to go to see charlize in a tight suit :P but it'll be cool to see my co-workers names in the credits. i saw a few people i know who worked on narnia's names in the credits... exciting :P

i want to do something really fun for new years. like a "go big or go home" kind of fun. haha.. any ideas? i have one, but i don't know how it's going to pan out. especially because i don't know what a lot of my friends are doing, two friends are leaving on a big trip the next day - may not be up for partying, one may have to be working, others may already have plans of their own. last new years i hung out with a couple and basically watched them (and everyone else) make out all night. that was fun.... not. :P anyways.. maybe it'll just be me and dick clark rockin it (does he even still do it?) i dunno.. i've been kind of out of the "really fun things to do" ideas. 2006 might be spent ringing it in with my family.. which isn't a bad thing.. but usually means my mom downstairs watching tv, my dad on the computer, my cousin in his room across the hall (although he may be out with his friends.. more exciting plans than me.. haha) and me in my room and my 13" tv. awesome huh? someone save me.

2:14 time for sleep.. if i sleep until 8am (absolute latest i can..) i can still get almost 6hrs of sleep :)

look at the stars, look how they shine for you

me: is this bill?
bill: yup..
me: there's a limo waiting outside for you
bill:

hahaha.. the funniest moment of today. so i have a new job. sort of a new job, new position, but same company. i'm excited, yet i'm scared. i was a little sad, but today i'm having one of those days where you are glad that you got out when you could. does that sound awful? i guess it's just the on-going thing of not feeling appreciated. i don't need a lot, i don't need big flashy signs or lots of "sugar words" (as my mom would call them), but there is a lot i do, and a lot i try hard to make things flow that aren't even supposed to be my job, but i want things to be better you know? maybe i try too hard or something and it's my fault, but i can't just sit back and do nothing, and when i watch people who do it frustrates me. maybe i have control issues.. who knows.. and then sometimes it makes me not want to do anything either, but i really do think in the end that maybe people aren't saying it to your face, but they do recognize the hard work you put it. so i'm glad that i feel like it's finally worth something. which is not the attitude i should have, because you shouldn't work hard only to be recognized, but some days i want to be vain... so there.

i start my new job on monday, so there are a lot of things to wrap up. it's a little hectic and a little busy, especially when i'm chained to my desk. bleh. i am scared that i won't do a good job, but before this year i was scared that i'd totally screw up my current job. it'll push me and i'll probably be learning a lot... so good times ahead right? i was a little wishy washy only because i had the whole "is this what i 'really' want to do?" conversation with myself. especially when i found out there were opportunities of things that i think that i "want" to do, and what i have is the "safe" choice. but.. what i "want" to do i have never actually done, so maybe i'll hate it, and maybe i'll like this new job all the same. plus, i'm still "young" so i can still move on to do what i "want" if i still want to do it. right? i've been at this point where i think the situation i have is the situation i'll be stuck in for the rest of my life, and that one year is SO long.. but in the grand scheme of life it's just one more step. but i know that what i'm going to be doing will be great. i'm just getting the whole cold feet thing.

since i will also be more financially able thoughts of moving out have also been entering my mind. my sister comes home soon, so me playing house will come to an end, yet she's also not staying for entirely too long, so there's the time i can just suck it up and live at home, or i can just be on my own for good. or so i think. saving money is nice though. but stupid misunderstandings turned not so great arguments make me think otherwise. sometimes i have these moments where i realize how little my family and friends know me, which sounds like a really awful statement. and there are things that they know about me.. but small little things that i wish someone would pick up on, but things don't go my way. maybe they do pick up on it and don't want to deal with me, but sometimes i need to be babied... maybe it goes along with the wanting to be vain. i know that's how "parents are" and i should become a better person and deal with it, but sometimes i just don't want to. is me being stubborn worth $1000/month?

6 more hours...

pay attention kids.. trust me.. it helps.

jean: i'm watching the biggest loser.. even though i'm supposed to be cleaning.
sakura: oh.. isn't it the guy with the long hair?
jean: ....
jean: umm.. I DON'T KNOW I HAVEN'T FINISHED WATCHING!
sakura: oh wait.. i don't really know.. um.. i mean..
jean: i've been watching for a hour and forty minutes.. and now...
sakura: i dunno.. but he was on all the magazines
jean: STOP!! just stop talking..
sakura: okay.

hahahha.. she was right by the way.

hey they're accepting applications.. maybe i should send in an audition tape. :P

argh.. procrastinating.. need to clean!