i'm so antsy right now.. and i don't even really know what to do. a harsh lesson has been learned this week.. and you know.. i don't know.. it's something that i should have learned a long time ago... but i guess it just really needs to be beat into my head... because this is the 3rd time that it's happened.. and i guess i didn't really learn my lesson until now. and who knows if i'm too nice or naive of a person to just let it slide this time. only time will tell i guess. but carrie and i were talking about people who step on other people, to get what they want, no matter the costs, and she said it was human nature.. survival of the fittest. and i say that it sucks. sure.. it's life and i can't avoid it. and i feel stupid for being an idealist where i think that people should be considerate of others.. and that's my fault i guess. pete told me once that i was a total doormat because i was so passive and never said anything to anyone that was bothering me, and today brianne reiterated the same thing. i know that this probably doesn't make any sense to anyone.. but i guess.. if you want to take anything from reading this.. please just be considerate of others. especially your friends. take their feelings into consideration, and try not to always put yourself before others. and if i'm ever too nice to other people who i shouldn't be nice to, give me a good whack in the head. thanks.