so i basically hate carrie chen, because she is a huge moron and her clumsyness is contagious. i don't really know if i want to be associated with her anymore. today after i worked long and hard for her we went out to dinner because she had had a steak craving for a few days. and i flaked out on her a few times so i felt bad (never again). so we went to outback steakhouse and she ordered steak and i got chicken. we were eating just fine.. and we were sharing food like good little friends and so i grabbed the steak sauce after she was done and flipped it upside down real quick to make sure the sauce was consistent. when i flipped it back up i had A1 steak sauce all over me, on the seat, on my pants, on my shirt, my neck, my face and burning in my left eye. carrie.. not thinking at all.. decided not to screw the lid back on, just place it on top, and not tell me when she handed it to me. i bet she was one of those hoodlums that unscrewed the pepper before she left breakfast places. so yes.. and instead of helping me and my burning eye, she laughed.. cackled at my misfortune. what a jerk. the kind waitress brought me lots of water and extra napkins to wipe my face and neck and soda water for my clothes and carrie sat and laughed so much that she could hardly choke down her food. what kind of moron doesn't put the cap on food? ugh! that's the last time i share condiments with that clumsy fool!! ;P

you know what i also hate.. the way my parents constantly try to force me to do things that i don't want. and also how they treat me like a child. i feel like i'm in middle school all over again. i know i probably brought it upon myself since i didn't move out.. but it sometimes it's ridiculous. and although i know they mean well they keep shoving stuff in my face in regards to jobs and crap. like my mom made me take the cbest and now wants me to apply as an special ed or office assistant sub, and my dad wants me to apply with the city of los angeles .. even if it's like a janitorial job. my mother wants me to work in the school distict and my father wants me to get a city job. it's not like i don't appreciate their helpfulness.. but at the same time they shove it in my face and expect me to apply and take the job.. because i don't get the job i will be a failure, so i have to get it. but like they don't even consider what i want to do. i know i can't get everything that i want, but they act like i HAVE to apply for these jobs. i mean.. sure it doesn't hurt applying, or doing this work.. but i don't want to get stuck somewhere.. and live a life full of regret from not being able to do anything that i really wanted for myself. there were so many things and so many friends that i lost out on from my parents and them not letting me do anything. i don't really want that to happen when i'm 21 years old and a college graduate. maybe i should have moved out when i had the chance. rooar!! i'm done now. sorry for complaining.. please still love me.