i'm kind of tired, and i don't really want to blog, but i feel like i should. when did blogging become a chore? hahah.. i also have a sink full of dishes that i "should" wash... but blogging is just a tad bit less annoying :P

i have had the weirdest sleeping schedule. i've been trying to kick the uber bad jet lag (sleep @ 8am, until 4pm) habit so i've been trying to wake up a little bit earlier, but then i get REALLY tired and then crash like at 8pm or so, and then wake up at 3am and not be able to get to sleep. which is the worst! plus.. it's weird to me because when have i only been able to sleep 7 hours? i have slept for 12 or 14 hours before, why is my body stopping at 7? so last night i naturally woke up at 3am, and couldn't - no matter how hard i tried - get back to bed until 7am-ish or so. i slept until 11am, and i've been okay and 11pm seems like an okay time to go to bed. i hope i don't wake up at 6am. i wanted to have a sex and the city marathon in my room hoping it will entice me to clean it, but i haven't gotten around to that yet either. chores chores chores... so much that i need to do before i start work (yikes!!) next week and really am too pooped to do anything.

so yea.. starting the new job. i'm a little scared and a little excited all at the same time. it's nice to finally have a "real job" but i'm apprehensive hoping that i don't suck and they fire me on the first day. of course that's never happened to me and i'm a "quick learner" or so my resume says.. so i should be able to handle it right? i'm still on my "probational" period to make sure i like the job and more importantly they like me... so... i'm hoping it goes well. and that i really like it... it's not just something i'm putting up with. because that's a good quality to have in a job right?

christmas eve and christmas was uneventful but still nice and fun. since it was just me and my dad no real big hoopla. i opened one gift on christmas eve (as it's something me and my sister always did) and then rest on christmas. i didn't get a lot of presents this year, but just from my good friends. my parents don't really do presents anymore, and jeff and my sister's is coming when i choose it.. if that makes sense to you.. if not, oh well. but it's a present, just not one i could open. but i gave my sister a bunch of sporadic christmas gifts, random cutesy stuff i'd buy because i thought of her, and then one big thing she really wanted, but couldn't buy for herself because it wasn't something she "needed".. but isn't that was christmas presents are for?! :) i think after i bought that for her, she says "you want to know what your christmas present is?" hahah... so i got it early, which isn't much of a surprise.. but i think that seeing a reaction or knowing how much they like it is a good trade off for opening present early when you're together.

before christmas i also went to beth and ryan's holiday party. it was fun, i had a good time chatting with nicole and craig in our "non-torrance" or should i say "non-north high" (because i'm torrance too!!) section of the room. the gift exchange was interesting i guess.. beth tried to "save me" but it was kind of a failed effort... but thanks for the thought. only your good friends will take a gift dive for you. :P i kept saying "i should get going" but never actually did until much much later... being distracted by conversation, poker, and then more conversation - i didn't get home until 5:30am or so.. but don't tell my dad that :P i just said "i dunno"

my aunt has been here.. but it's been kind of blah since she's been sick or sleeping a lot. not sure if it's jet lag, making up for the past months of sleep deprivation or both - but my mom's schedule is out of whack as well. so during the days i just want to go out, since i'm not really doing anything at home and sometimes everyone is sleeping... but then my mom makes me feel all guilty - like all i ever do is go out, or i dunno. why can't i clean the house? it's hard because so much of the mess isn't mine... so where would i start? what would i do? argh. plus i hate to feel like i'm just 'wasting my time' like.. i think that's why i have such time issue problems. i pack so many things in because i like to feel like i've used up every second of my time and i'm not wasting my time waiting around when i could have been doing something else. except it usually backfires and i end up being late. but the point of this story was that if i'm just at home watching tv or sitting around with my parents - i'd like to be out doing other things. but then comes the guilt trips... anyways.. this isn't making any sense i'm sure. so i'll stop.

earlier this week sakura, beth and i went to meet up with hailes for dinner at lucille's bbq. everyone except for sakura had never been there, so it was a good time and the food was really good - so we were happy. afterwards jimmy joined us and we watched meet the fockers. i guess i haven't watched a movie when it first came out in awhile because i didn't expect the theatre to be so crowded. i guess it is the more popular movie theatre in the area, and it's holiday break and it's only been out a week, but we walked in during previews and it took us forever to find seats and we had to split up. crazy. during the movie i heard the sound of water running and realized it was really hard rain - and everyone in the theater was murmuring a little. and then after the movie we found out that there was a tornado warning in torrance (which is so weird!) around the time we heard the hard rain, and it was pretty rainy and windy when we got out of the theatre. the tornado actually went through inglewood - which isn't that far from torrance, but it's crazy that we even have tornadoes out here. while driving home though we got pulled over and the cops were all like "i smell quite a bit of alcohol - is anyone drinking back there" which of course we replied "no".. because we weren't - but isn't that the standard answer anyways?! it was a little scary - and i thought the cops were going to give me a ticket for not wearing my seat belt (which i tried to put on in the stealth right before they pulled us over).. but afterwards we said they were just trying to fulfill their quotas and hoping to get lucky pulling over a car full of youngins with shady lookin' hailes in the front seat :P hah...

while at the origins store with sakura, i wasn't intending to buy anything but got suckered into some pricey pore cleanser mask. i hope it works. that's what i was doing at 3am this morning when i couldn't sleep :P it stung a little at first, but when i washed it off it didn't seem to work like the miracle the girl at the store said it was... but i guess that's her job, and it's not going to happen in one day eh? i just thought that was funny. who knew you could own so many products for your face and for your skin. i guess you do have to work so hard to keep it looking good. last night during my insomnia i used the mask, then washed my face, then some toner, then some lotion and then some clearasil. crazyness.. if i had had some biore strips i probably would have done that too. hah. have you ever seen though biore type masks for your whole face?! that must be uncomfortable. :P