it's 4:29am and i just got back from school. how sucky is that.. too bad i have to go back in 6 hours. whoever invented school needs to die.

the Lakers lost by 1point. And it's not like I really really care.. but it's just kind of sad to see such a close game like that. Like if they totally got their asses kicked.. then maybe they'd deserve it.. but like.. when it's soooo close like it was.. it's so hard. hahah.. Michele came out of her room and I asked if she was okay and she didn't even want to talk to me. Anyways.. I caught the end of the game and I felt all nervous and what not.. which is weird because I probably wouldn't have even realized the game was on if it wasn't for the million people in Round Table tonight. Anyways.. it's sad. :(

I really didn't do much else today, class, did a little work for my COMT video, napped, Circle K... ooh.. and I even read a little yay! I chit chatted with Nicole and I got an email from Megan! So that makes me happy.. (the last two things.. not that other school work junk..yuk.) Anyways.. I have to head back to school to work some more on my video.. whoo hoo... but that's all.. my life is pretty boring. Actually.. it's really boring.

I am so broke.. it's really not funny. I was trying to balance my checkbook today.. not successfully of course. I'm missing $16 somewhere... but anyways.. after all the expenses.. I have like no money. I've transferred almost all of my savings into my checking account and wrote checks.. and now it's all gone! Where did it go. Yuck.. I really need to get a better job. Hopefully during the summer. But then I want to get an internship... so I don't know how well that will all work out. *sigh. Anyways.. not much.. just really frustrated with school. I tried to re-dub the tapes for my video project so that they were in the right speed, and I did it wrong, so I had to do it all over again. 2 hours of my life.. wasted. grr... and then I'm trying to tape more stuff, and contact people for interviews.. it's just not really coming together and it's starting to make me really mad. But hopefully we'll get done in time and then I will be happy. for a few seconds at least before I get swamped with papers and reading at what not.. I should probably start setting up camp in the library.

oh yeah.. happy memorial day. i hope you had a blast.

dude.. I am so beat. haha.. it's my own damn fault too. I think I had this conversation with Carrie once.. about how we never learn and we're such masochists. I always wait til the last minute to do everything.. and it's retarded.. because if I had a little more discipline or something like that.. I would have to bust my ass all the time. Anyways.. today I went to the kickboxing class and it TOTALLY kicked my ass. I am so out of shape. After that, ate lunch, watched some interviews for my Hawaii Video with Randi. I holed myself up in the editing room for a good couple hours. Then chilled, dinner and then headed on over to the SMAC house to hang out. There were a lot of people there actually.. and we watched tv, hung out in the man room, drank, darts and foosball. It was all good times. I think the best was the Stephanie vs. Mikey Mauldin game.. but it's really something you had to be there for.. or an in person story. It's a fun group. Tomorrow I definitely have to hit the road running and put my nose to the grind and get my shit done. The next three weeks are going to painful... I have the video, the children's lit paper, the in class midterms, the website, cki stuff, finals... argh!! I hate school! Hopefully Angelee will come down and visit.. that would be way fun.

*sigh.. this week is finally over.. and on to the next. I'm stoked though because it's like the weekend is just starting cuz it's a three day weekend! whoo hoo! Anyways.. umm. this week... Thursday: went to Inner City Games tutoring.. which was alright. Julie and Hailes came with and we made a "newsletter" with the kids. but mostly it was stuff we made them type out.. and a bunch of pictures they ripped off the internet.. and then I put it together. Then Kathy and I went to the SOLO banquet. It was really nicely decorated and free food (that's always good) and we won Outstanding Community Service Program for CKI! Yay.. it was funny because earlier I felt like I had lost the "spirit" and it's not like this totally refreshed it. But this one guy said that you should continue to give back not just every once in awhile, but everyday.. and that made me feel somewhat better. It dunno.. it was weird.. I guess to know that what we do really does make a difference.. because so many times it doesn't seem like it. But anyways... Went to the Delta Sig boat dance with Vivian and then El Cotixan.. mmm.. I really do have to stop eating at 1:30am though.

Friday: one class, and the other was cancelled.. that was nice :) Went to the Kiwanis Luncheon and then chilled at home for a bit. Chit chatted on the phone for quite awhile and just caught up with a lot of people. It was good times, Costco with Vivian, then dinner with Sakura, took care of the stuff for LSSP and then got desert with Vivian and Sakura. Came home to a house full of sorority girls and fraternity guys... Diana's friends came over and after partied after their formal. Until the cops came and told them to simma' down, so Diana kicked them out.. haha.

Saturday: Went to Habitat Restore for CKI... we had a good amount of people so that was fun. We mixed up some paint, but never actually got to paint.. sad... But I got to play with the power drill that was hooked up to this mixer thing. It was like making a cake... except it was paint. Needless to say I got paint all over me and even a little bit in my mouth at one point... that was kind of gross. Came home and napped... soo tired. Woke up, wrestled over whether or not to go to the OCC Pajama Jam, and in the end I decided not to go because a)I didn't want to drive there and back (esp. not by myself) and b)I didn't really have the money. Sorry to all the folks we convinced to go and sorry to Mike for almost going but not. Oh yeah.. sorry Ryan for not going period.. next time.. promise. :P Instead.. hung out at the SMAC house.. chilled, watched tv and movies.. and then went to a party down by state.. including getting terribly mixed up when we all tried to follow each other. It was good times though.. ate food (again.. at 1:30am) and went back to the house, watched Valentine- which by the way.. is not the best movie to watch when you have to come back to an empty house. It's not the best movie content wise.. but it's pretty suspenseful.. especially because I'm a wuss. So yeah.. that's pretty much my night. Tomorrow I get to go to a kickboxing class.. I'm pretty stoked about that.. and I gotta work on my video with Randi. I got lay the smackdown on myself and clean my room and do my homework or I'm going to fail outta school!! And I gotta start looking for houses too. busy busy busy.. and it's only 9th week. Good news is is that Angelee is coming back on Monday and she might come down and visit me. YAY! okay. good night.

so i'm sitting in class... yeah.. this is fun. except i just fell.. (again). yes.. i know.. i have problems. i was sitting on one of those rolly chairs and i thought it was broken because the bottom part you sit on wasn't flat. so i was sitting on the edge and all of a sudden the chair rolled back and my ass was on the floor. all of my group mates and the teacher were laughing at me. fantastic ... i like making a fool of myself in front of class.

mmm.. I don't really have anything interesting to blog about. Then why am I blogging.. you're probably wondering. (or maybe not). I guess it's just to feed my own addiction, and to give you something new to read.. even though it'll suck. Anyways.. I'm still trapped in that blah kind of mood. I don't know.. like.. sometimes its good, and sometimes it's not so good, but there hasn't really been anything to bring me out of the funk. I don't know if I'm being dragged down by the incessant ritual of my everyday life, or I'm being bogged down by school or Circle K. I know this is going to sound really really bad... but lately I've been wondering why I ran for President. Like maybe I should have just had a little more foresight, and this position has really bogged things down. Like around Convention a lot of people were like "yay.. I'm done" and I was never really like that.. but now.. I wish I was done. And it's almost kind of like I lost that love for CKI that has made us be in the K-Family for so long. So many people have found it again, right when I've lost mine. And I don't know if maybe it's become too much paperwork and not enough of the experience.. or what. I don't know.. people have said that I need a break, or that summer will replenish me.. but that just can't seem to come soon enough.

School is a whole other issue that I won't get into.. but things are winding down, and although I feel like they should because it's so long, I don't have that feeling like my classes are wrapping up. I don't know.. maybe cuz I missed that one week of school? Who knows. But there just seems like there is so much to do and I have no motivation to do it... I really just want to like.. I don't know.. sit in the middle of my room and do absolutely nothing. And it's kind of odd because lately I've been feeling so lost. And that there's really no one to talk to, because if I do, I feel like they don't really understand me or that I'm burdening them, or I just sound lame and whiny. And no one wants that. And when I try to find people to understand me... and I don't.. it just makes it worse I guess. I don't know really. I spent tonight by myself watching Felicity, and that was a lot of fun. It's sad that it's coming to an end, but I guess it's better than having really lame episodes. To go out on your own, rather than forced out by the system. Spending time by yourself isn't necessarily bad... unless you want to be around people. But I don't want to be around people just for the sake of being around people... but I want to be around people who want to be around me and that we'll have a good time together. Is that too much to ask? Because I'm starting to think that maybe it is. When I'm out all I want to do is go home, and when I'm at home all I want to do is be out. I am one confused chick. I really do think I need to get out of here though.. away from everything... three more weeks.

hmm.. today was interesting i suppose. i did something i never did before... but something i needed to do, although I kind of already guessed how it was going to turn out. but i just needed to know for sure, and hear it.. you know.. to make it concrete.. (does that make any sense?) but nevertheless... it was a learning experience. whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger right? hah. umm.. slept through my first class... oops.. was late to my second one. I was SO tired though, but it was cool.. I got to talk to Kirsten who I rarely see... it was fun catching up a bit. After class got some Jamba Juice and vegged, ran errands for Circle K, and then had our Banquet. It was pretty good.. I "donated" $86 to PTP to save myself from being pied. haha.. isn't that ridiculous.. eh.. goes to a good cause? I think that's worse than the time I spent $42 to buy Ryan Long at the div 19 date auction. hahah.. remember that? What a freak I am. I swear.. it was only because I hated that girl Cima so much.. ew. Anyways.. banquet was done, came home, chit chatted with friends, cleaned up the house some.. and then went to TGI Friday's with Vivian cuz she got back from San Fran and was hungry so I tagged along. I got some free ice cream. And water of course. Sometimes hanging out is more fun than sitting around by yourself. Even if you are accompanied by multiple IM's. Eh.. I guess this day wasn't so good to add on to my weeks of blah. It ended better than it started though I suppose. eh who knows... I just wish summer was here already.. dang.

helllooooo... well nothing much is new. i didn't really do much today... it's been kind of chill since Sun God.. I guess I'm just all tired out. I woke up and chilled and watched Clueless.. *aww* and Randi came over we talked about our video project for class. I hope it goes okay.. I only have a week and a half to get it done. And then Tom came over and fixed my computer. For the record... TOM IS THE BESTEST EVER!! He's totally my new favorite person... and plus he's coming back to do some more work. What a great guy. :) hehehe. But seriously.. I forgot how fun he was to hang out with. Too bad I got fired that one summer.. haha.. stupid kids. Anyways.. I'm glad that we got to chill a bit. Hopefully we'll get to hang out some more. haha.. and maybe he'll teach me how to drive his car.. heeheheh. a stickshift Mustang... what do you think my chances are? Anyways.. went to the Hawaii Club Luau with Randi and did some homework videotaping and interviewing.. and chilled and am currently talking to Benji. And avoiding watching Never Been Kissed.... hahaha.. I don't need to depress myself further.. although .. drooling over Michael Vartan just might be worth it. :P

i ripped this shoutbox off on nicole's site. it's pretty nifty.. thanks nicole!

hmm.. wow.. it feels like the week is finally over, but then.. now the weekend is half over, and the new week is starting already!! it's all too fast! yikes. annnyways. this week has be busy, and blah and tiring all at the same time. circle k stuff all over the place, meetings here, meetings there. On Thursday I went with Justin to Los Angeles to see my sister's film. It was the weirdest thing because I saw Chi there... I didn't really expect to see anyone I knew, and Justin saw a bunch of his friends from home. Interesting. I met JOHN CHO which was so exciting. I was so flabbergasted and starstruck, I felt a little lame. I got free boba, and some other junk, took tons of pictures, and met this really cool movie star chick who runs a performance school in LA. She said I could audition and take classes and what not, and like some of her students are going to be on broadway and all the teachers are like from Miss Saigon. It's really amazing.. I'm really considering it.. it seems like a really good opportunity. Maybe I can get Nicole to come with me or something.

umm.. Oh yeah.. I also saw Peter Abas on Wednesday at Ralphs.. it was the funniest thing because it was all just so random. He came down to visit his brother and yuk it up at Sun God. See.. UCSD is a great school. haha. Friday, of course, was Sun God. And for those of you who don't know... lemme explain it to ya. Our school, like any other school, puts on a big free concert every quarter. And Sun God is the one they do in the spring. But it's not JUST a concert, it's the one day that UCSD really seems to let loose and be a "party school." They usually try and get big acts to play, there's booths on Library Walk and near Muir (game, food etc.) and it's totally where people are drunk all day, ditch class and drink, drink in class, and just kind of hang out and enjoy the sun. On RIMAC field they set up this tented area where they played techno music, there's those giant inflatable slide/obstacle course, whirley things. It's the best. So yesterday, Cake played, along with Nock-turnal (?), No Use For a Name and Five Crown (which was the battle of the bands winner). It was tons of fun and I think Cake was totally awesome. Julie and Vivian and I hung out with Allan and Ryan and his little sisters. It was all in the name of Sun God fun.

The hard part was that I had to get up at 7am to go to Junior Olympics for CKI. I had to do security and keep the people off the railing and have them sit in the bleachers. I got so much attitude and dirty looks.. not just from the kids, but from the parents. I hate rude people like that, and that early in the morning when I totally could have been sleeping, I just kind of shot it right back at some of them. Dah well... some people just need to learn. And Becca was so funny because she was all like yelling about how they were setting bad examples for the kids. I think the Kiwanians thought we were crazy. I napped, tried to fix my computer (with no luck of course) and eat dinner and watched Ocean's 11 with the roomies. I love that movie.. I think it's so well made and done. It's awesome.. I swear.. I've watched it like 3 times in the past month. (yes.. I do have a life). Now I really do have to clean my room.. but it was good night in. I'm sad that I missed the 70's Disco Water Polo party, but it would have taken way too much out of me. I can't even walk!! My legs are so sore, and from what I don't even know. Probably just running around all of yesterday. *sigh* So that's what's going on with me... how about you?

i'm in a wretched mood. not like any of you care, but i just thought i'd tell you anyways.

but really.. i think my blogger is just a forum for me to complain. because when i complain to people.. i'm sure they get annoyed. this way.. it's optional.. and you read it. it's your own fault. i blog for my own selfish reasons then i suppose. who knows. it's so funny though because this weekend started out pretty good, and ended badly. eh.. saturday was julian's anchorage. i got to play with cute babies.. it was great. then the track and field championships. i did lots of running and stairclimbing. then i attempted to clean my room after my shutters fell off my window (yes.. my house is falling apart) and then went to the Pike party with Kristen and Vivian. that was a lot of fun. i wanted to go to Sigma Chi Derby Days at Sports City, but a) it was $5 and probably really crowded and b) we had told Ryan we were going to the Pike/Track party already. so whatever. it was a good time.. and fun of drunken antics. too many to name, but it ended with Carne Asada Fries at Roberto's so you know the night was good. hahah. Anyways.. today was a way lazy day.. watched some movies... Centerstage and Model Behavior. (hahaha) and tried to clean my room and fix my computer, which apparently there's nothing wrong with.. i don't know. my computer just likes to freak out from time to time. ate dinner at Chili's (yum) and then hung out with Kristen and Vivian. did some random stuff and now i'm home realizing all the stuff i have to do. blah.

i think it was the ice luge that did me in.

tonight was a fun party night. it was a lot of good times. hehe.. wow.. i'm surprised that i ever used that term. it's so nicole and not me. anyways.. it started off not so greatly, but slowly go better. umm... hmm.. thursday.. what did I do thursday.. oh I just went to class, well one of them anyways.. the other one I didn't want to walk across campus to be late, and staying and talking to friends seemed like a better option (yes.. i know.. shame on me). but yeah.. i blame it on vivian. haha. so we sat in price center. at 3:30 I waited at Sun God to see if people would show up to tutoring, which no one did :( and then drove myself through nasty traffic to the tutoring center to find out that it was closed. :P I raced back to school to see if I could catch Vivian before she walked home.. but she had gotten a ride with someone else, and then I wanted to see if Kristen and Randi still wanted to meet, but umm. no.. they didn't either. boo.. but on my way home I did see Andrew at the bus stop and gave him a ride home, and then got to visit Adam and Thomas cuz they live in the same complex. that was a lot of fun and I'm really glad that I got to hang out with Andrew. :) hehe.. he likes *NSYNC :) anyways.. chilled at home, watched some tv.. and then later went out with Vivian and Kristen to Porter's Pub for open mic night. Met up with Nick and Mikey and Dave and his sister and just hung out. It was really funny though because there was this saxophone player that all these girl were gawking over, and it was the same guy Kimmy and I met freshman year that totally liked her. hahaha.. but I don't think he knows that I know.. well cuz he doesn't even really remember me. :P And then Vivian and I went to TGI Friday's and pigged out (of course) and saw a lot of UCSD kids there.. it was kind of crazy.

Today... was a mess of a day. The toilet was clogged this morning, I was late to class, I made a fool out of myself in class today and all the people around me were laughing, and the teacher was trying so hard not to laugh because she was lecturing, but I could see her smirking. And then she saw outside of class when she left and I was all like.. uhh.. hi.. and she was just smiling and laughing. oops. Yikes. Then I worked for 6 hours, came home, fixed my toilet (it was SO disgusting), and then cleaned my dirty dirty bathroom. If I never clean another bathroom or fix another toilet it will be too soon. I was so pooped, and then Kristen called and wanted to go out. ahaha.. But we went to a Shai, Adam, Jason and Grant's party. It was interesting because it was kind of like an AEPi party because those boys are all AEPi boys, but it wasn't huge.. so it was nice. Kristen and I were highly entertained by the drunken antics of the many, watching people use the beer bongs.. etc. blah blah blah.. it doesn't sound fun when you write it out, but it was a lot of fun... we talked and laughed a lot. And then we went to Max and Blair's party. They have a really nice house by the beach in Del Mar. But we saw a lot of old friends and what not. It was a lot of fun. It was also really random that this guy who went to Bishop Montgomery was there.. and he heard me say that I'm from Torrance and he was all like.. I went to Bishop! haha.. small world. But he was kind of rude... but he was also way drunk.. so I guess.. just belligerent. But it was good talking to all the people and what not. I really like those parties where people are either friendly or you know the people so you have people to talk to and things to say. :) But it was a lot of fun today, more fun than I had expected. Not the kind of fun I had expected, but nevertheless way fun. :P

why don't you people comment dammit!

so this should be a short blog because it's 2:35am and i'm pretty tired. anyways.. today was an alright day i suppose. yesterday was funny.. i went to my classes and came home, and i was supposed to go to the CALPIRG meeting at 6pm, i took a nap at 5pm, woke up various times due to people calling me and then woke up at 3am realizing i slept the entire night. yikes. needless to say I missed the meeting... sorry. but i got out of bed, brushed my teeth and took out my contacts and went back to sleep. :) until this morning.. wow.. that's a long time. anyways.. went to class today, chilled with Geoffrey in PC today. it was good, we talked. not being on campus much I don't really get to see too many people, so when i do, it's nice. i came home, watched Full House re-runs.. hehehehe. And the cleaned up a bit. Later I went to the Preuss School to watch their Lacrosse Game cuz Dave coaches them. I think that's super awesome that he does that, and they won their only game.. their last one.. which is pretty awesome. They were SO excited. of course, and the whole thing kind of reminded me of high school, and made me miss it. Sad.. haha.. maybe because their team lost all their games except one.. reminds me of the boys water polo team. haha.. but I loved those guys, and traveling with them. high school was so much less complicated! Anyways.. the Preuss School is REALLY nice, a lot nicer than the permanent CAMS building is now. haha.. isn't that sad? but yeah.. it's really kind of cool. And afterward the principal went up to Dave and showered him with compliments, which is I'm sure not what he's looking for, but must have been nice.

Afterwards, went home, chilled, talked to Julie on the phone, and then had my Circle K meeting at 8. It was a longer than I had planned (THREE HOURS!).. but our board talked about a lot of stuff that needed to be done, and a lot more that we didn't get done, but we're having another one (yikes). I guess it's good to have these cuz then our board can talk and work on stuff outside of just the one meeting. I feel like I do a lot of talking, and I have a lot of high expectations, and I hope that people don't see me in this dictatorship role. On Monday I kind of slipped and said that Sakura and I were going to win something because we wanted to.. and everyone just kind of jeered or laughed.. i dunno.. it was kind of embarassing.. but I mean.. the board does so much planning.. it's hard not to think of it that way... or am I just a jerk? Anyways.. did that.. talk to my friends on IM a bit.. and then did MORE cki work, and then some homework. ugh.. my life is crazy. hopefully i'll get to go the PB block party this weekend.. and have some fun. or at least at sun god or something. have a belligerent good time. hehehe. anyways.. that's that.. night fools.

i flippin hate papers. but we did have some more fun with the love calculator. it's faired pretty well on mania's and myself's behalf. except for a few certain percentages that are too high for their own good. yuck. anyways.. we got a good laugh out of it. i really love mania and I'm glad that we're friends. it's so funny, because at orientation, I met her and I was like.. "wow I really like that girl and I really want to get to know her." and we did freshman year. we have the same sense of humor, which is what brought us together. our love of "nacho cheese" word pun corny jokes. and we have this innate ability to make each other laugh so hard. it's great. she's one of those friends that you hear about that you'll have for lifetimes to come. ew.. i'm getting all mushy. but we had a really good time and she made me feel tons better. it's sad that all the girls can't hang out anymore.. like i saw kimmy for a bit today, and kristen for a bit today, and talked to trish for a little bit today. sad.. this is why i miss freshman year. but oh well. we have, and will continue to, survive these minute differences. anyways.. i'm procrastinating.. not wanting to do my papers. and this is what i've been doing all evening. yuck.

this weekend was way chill. except for a few minor bumps. saturday morning i realized that i had lost one of my contacts friday night when i changed to my glasses so that i could drive home. SUCKS. that's another $50. and i was so good about not losing contacts.. but the first week i get my new ones. sucks hardcore. anyways.. so saturday i spent at the library, and then napping, and then went to the airport to pick up my daddy. he was all cute and clean shaven :) and i parked in the meters and got a spot that already had 40 minutes! yay me. i order my bmg cd's, chit chatted and what not.. and slept. sunday i chilled, studied some. i had dinner with Carrie and pigged out on BJ's and Diddy Reese cookies and ice cream. not good.. my stomach hurt so bad. but whatever.. we just sat around and chilled and talked. i wish she lived a lot closer so that we could hang out all the time and just sit in each other's apartments everyday instead of the once every two month things that we do. haha.. i feel that way about all my friends. and the funniest thing.. is that i hardly do that with my friends that live here.. haha.. we're too busy! anyways.. i came back, talked to my mommy a little bit. i was kind of stupid and didn't come home in time to go with my dad to the airport, which was kind of the reason i stayed so late. oops.. sucks. anyways. drove back at like midnight.. i go SO tired around oceanside.. and that stretch of land where you're in san diego but not really. ugh. anyways.. i finally got home, unloaded the car. and of course, instead of sleeping.. i'm blogging and chit chatting. i found this love calculator on nicole's blogger. it's so lame and gay, but yet.. i'm so easily amused by it. you enter two people's names and it tells you what percent chance you have at a relationship. it's so retarded.. but it's fun entering all the names you know and seeing what they result in. apparently.. the love calculator says that nicole should be a lesbian... or dating the spawn of satan. hahahahahh

tonight has been one of the more interesting nights of recent dates. but not in an interesting good way, but more like an interesting bad way. haha.. um.. so anyways.. today i took Vivian to the airport at like 5am, which was tiresome. caught a nap and was late to class. sucks. but it might have been for the better because we were watching some documentary a lady did on her grandfather (in relation to wwII, interment camps and asian stereotypes). But she talked a lot about her grandparents, and how her grandfather died before she got to meet him, and I think that if I had watched the whole thing it might have made me sad.. so maybe everything happens for a reason. hahaha.. Mania and I did Price Center for a little bit during lunch.. mostly to send of the MRF and get some Jamba Juice.. nothing too interesting. Went home, napped, and then ate lunch. I have to say.. that Michele's George Foreman Lean Grilling Machine is AMAZING. I have never good frozen meat so fast and had it taste so good and got to toast buns at the same time!!! IT'S MY NEW OBSESSION. I love it.. I use it like everyday. creepy.. I made fun of Nicole when she was all obsessed with her Brita.. cuz hey.. it's an everyday appliance right.. and I made fun of Ben too when he went on and on about the George Foreman.. but seriously.. duuuuude it's SO incredible. okay.. I'll stop. anyways.. packed up my stuff and drove to san dimas to meet up with Mike. dude.. i hate frikkin traffic. i serious sat in like 2 hours of traffic.. it sucked big fat ones. so yeah.. i FINALLY get to san dimas, mike and i FINALLY get to hollywood and then everything goes haywire from there. we walk around aimlessly, take forever to decide what to do (like we always do), things don't go as planned, communication mishaps ensue, people change their plans without telling anyone, and Kenny gets a flat tire and while he tried to fix it..everyone forgets to call him back. hahahahha. oops.. not funny. Anyways.. it's was a dramatic night nonetheless. I feel bad that it turned out the way that it did.. it was supposed to be a momentous occasion, and one day we'll look back on the whole situation and see how funny it is.. but whatever. it was an interesting night.. now i have another story to tell about how retarded my friends are. :P (as if I dont' have enough).

hmm.. so this week is finally over. thank you lord. (although i feel somewhat weird saying that because i'm not really religious). anyways... I've had quite a long week. no sleep sunday night, running my cki meeting all delirious. I probably freaked a few people out. passing out tuesday, no sleep tuesday night- wrote a paper and studied for a midterm.. not too shabby. go me. (it's amazing what a good procrastinator I've become.. isn't that horrible?) catching up on last week's dawson's & felicity (i cried), and sleeping for 15 hours, 6pm until 9am, thursday, chocolate chip pancakes with michele! yum, school, lunch with mania, catching up on yesterdays dawson's & felicity, working out, and talking to my favorite friends. :) hmm.. i dunno.. not too much going on. I got a fatty sunburn on Wednesday from the CKI BBQ and it sucks because a)it hurts, b) it looks way funky, and c) it will peel. i was wearing my gap scoop neck stretch shirt which i never ever wear because i always felt like the neckline was too low, but i guess i got fatter.. well i know i got fatter.. so the neck line sits a little higher.. but anyways.. so i have this weird scoop of red/brown hurtage on my chest, and my shoulders are totally red, and my arms are brown.. as well as my forearms. not to mention the weird sunglass tan that i have.. which i lie and tell people i swim.. haha.. good news is that i think i got rid of my band-aid tanline.

anyways.. so i went to rimac today.. saw some cute boys (who were busy staring at themselves in the mirror as they worked out) and then saw some girls. they were in the pit working out, and two things made me gag and hate girls. a) they were lifting weights in synchonization. anytime any girls do anything in synchonization (unless it's a dance routine, or not on purpose) it's pretty sickening.. like girls who all dress the same. yuck. i wanted to gag. b) these girls were really in shape (and yes.. maybe this whole blog is out of bitterness and jealousy) and had nice bodies.. and vivian (who is skinny as it is) comments on how she wants this girl's stomach (who's wearing a sports bra). then i see them comment and make motions to each other on what they'd want to fix. like make their waist smaller, their hips bigger, their chest bigger. so i dunno.. a) i guess girls have issues with their boobs no matter what size they are. b) they also have problems with their image no matter what size they are. but i guess it just irks me when un-fat people think that they're fat. because if un-fat people are fat, what does that make fat people, or obese people? i don't know.. i think it's just retarded. serious.. this girl pushed in her waist to like 15 inches around and said she wanted it to look like that. i mean.. i know seriously.. she didn't want it to be that small (i hope) but really.. it didn't need to be smaller.. the anorexia look isn't really in. or if it is.. i'd be in fatty trouble.. pun intended.